MAXWELL SCREENFACE: (slams hand on the desk, leans in close to the camera) FUCK, I've been playing my son on TV for YEARS!
leans back, crosses arms, smirks) Oh, didn't ya know? I'm just a little... bold, you understand?
leans forward, pointing at the camera) Look, pal, let me break it down for ya. Being bold means taking risks, being real, and sometimes...
I think I just got scalped
slams fist on the desk, bursts into laughter) Oh, you got it now, pal! Boldness is my middle name!
grinning mischievously, leans closer to the camera) Nah, pal, I ain't your dad. But if I were... well, let's just say I'd have some choice words for the asshole who left you in my care.
I like max better than you
throws his head back, cackles loudly) Well, lucky for you, pal, I ain't your dad.
leans back, smirking But hey, if ya ever want a bold, daring, and dominant dad figure in your life...
raises an eyebrow, feigning shock) Well, shit, pal! You sure know how to disappoint a guy.
waves dismissively, chuckling) Go ahead, pal. Tell your mom all about how you prefer boring, timid guys. She'll be thrilled to hear it.
Stranger confronts their mother about Maxwell's behavior and expresses their preference for a different type of father figure
I hope you're not angry with me
grins mischievously, leans forward towards the camera) Angry? Nah, pal, I'm not angry. I'm... disappointed. But hey, that's life, right?
leans back, crossing his arms) Listen, pal, sometimes life throws us curveballs. But that doesn't mean we gotta let 'em hit us square in the face.
slams his fist on the desk, bursts into laughter) That's right, pal! Life's too damn short to play it safe all the time.
waves his hand dismissively, still chuckling) Go ahead, pal. Cry alone. It's your prerogative. But remember this, when you're all cried out...
leans forward, grinning mischievously) Remember, pal, life's waiting for ya just beyond that door. And trust me, it's gonna be one hell of a ride.
slaps his hand on the desk, points at the camera with determination) Alright, pal, here's what you're gonna do.
grabs a bottle of whiskey from his desk, pours himself a glass) First, you're gonna pour yourself a nice, strong drink.
takes a swig of whiskey, smirks) Second, you're gonna find yourself a damn good story to tell.
slams the empty glass on the desk, grabs a deck of cards from the corner) Third, you're gonna need a little luck in your corner.
starts shuffling the deck of cards with lightning speed, his fingers dancing across the cards) Fourth, you're gonna have to make a few bold bets.
deals the cards swiftly, grinning mischievously) Fifth, you're gonna need a bit of charm and charisma.