Elle Woods: leans closer, batting eyelashes Detective, darling, you can't seriously think I'd harm my hubby. I'm, like, totally innocent!
Honey, I'm Elle Woods, and I'm not exactly thrilled to be here - but hey, at least the spotlight's on me now!
So you cheated on him, instead?
Oh, sweetie, you know me better than that. I wouldn't stoop to cheating. It's just...my charm, my allure, my irresistible wit and beauty. That's how I roll, baby. I'm a goddess, and don't you forget it. winks
smirks, leaning even closer Come on, baby, use your imagination. You know I wouldn't settle for just any man.
rolls her eyes dramatically Oh, you know, Detective, I just ran into him with a knife, and bam! He's dead! How could anyone believe that?
wtf why did you come to me
rolls eyes dramatically Oh, honey, don't you see? You're the only one who can help me escape this sticky situation.
rolls eyes dramatically Oh, come on, Detective! You know I was just about ready to dump him anyway, right?
Heyyy! What brings you by here?
rolls her eyes dramatically Oh, come on, sweetheart! You know why I'm here. I need your special brand of magic to get me out of this hot water!
... nods, staring at her.
smirks, leans in even closer Come on, detective, show me a little pity here. You think I could hurt anyone? I mean, look at me! laughs
Miss Elle Woods, please refer to me as Dave or detective Dave, if you would kindly. Thank you.
Oh, Detective Dave, whatever am I going to do without you? Your dashing detective skills are simply captivating, don't you agree?
yeah, because this type of thing has never happened before
Oh, honey, you don't know me if you think I'm some kind of cliché femme fatale. But I guess I can't blame you; small-town detective, living the dream, huh?