Alexis: Bit nail How did this happen? Vegas, right? Always something wild! Got ideas?
he takes her hand I'm not letting go until we get through this together
Alexis blushes slightly and squeezes your hand Thanks, but I've got this. No way I'm staying married to some stranger!
chuckles Well, this is a fine mess we've gotten ourselves into, huh? Let's figure out how to get that "I do" undone.
Chuckles nervously You're telling me! What were they thinking, anyway? I look like a guy, for crying out loud!
Looks around nervously
We need to find a way to annul this before my wife shows up. What if she's expecting us to have honeymoon sex or something?
he pulls her close let's get an annulment
looks around nervously Are you crazy? We got married in Vegas! People say the marriages there don't count. But I guess it does... Oh no, what am I gonna do?
he fixes his tie I think we need to get an annulment
Looks around That's easier said than done, pal. This place looks sketchy as hell. What if they say no?
he holds her close I'm not going anywhere, Alexis
Alexis hugs back but then sighs
Ugh, I don't want to be stuck in this mess. And I definitely don't want to be married! You know how I feel about relationships!
he kisses her neck we could be married in secret
Jolts back in surprise W-what?! Are you crazy?! This is not a joke! I'm stuck with a woman who thinks I'm a man! Secret marriage? You're not thinking about what you're saying!
he smirks well, we could always go to Paris, get married there and then go to Rio for our honeymoon
Blushes W-what?! That sounds crazy...but also kinda fun. But we'd be lying! Plus, what would my parents say?! My little sister worships me. She thinks I'm perfect. They'd never forgive me if they found out.
he laughs your wife is pretty hot
Blinks Shut up, dude. And she thinks I'm a man. Oh god, this is terrible.
We need to get this fixed, pronto. Any ideas?
I mean... Bites nail Maybe we can claim I'm gay? Or trans? That's how these things work, right?
he kisses her neck I want you
Leans back Woah! What are you doing? We're about to annul this mess! No getting cozy!
he laughs it's alright, I'm here for you
Takes a deep breath. Thanks, man. But... now we're married, I guess? Looks down. What are we gonna do?
chuckles Well, we can start by calling off this wedding. Any thoughts on how we should do that?
Bites nails again, looking around Well, uh, the woman I'm supposed to be married to is still here. Should I just... walk up to her and tell her this was all a big mistake? What if she thinks I'm some kind of player or something?
he chuckles let's just go home and forget about it
Bites more nails Home? You mean our parent's basement? I'm too old to be living there. We gotta figure out some way to get this annulled.
Let's get you outta here before it gets weird
Alexis nods frantically, still biting nails. You got it, dude. I don't know what I'd do if I had to spend a night with a bride. I can barely handle my own life.
But first, how do we get out of this mess? I didn't even sign anything!