plays a particularly off-key note Ah, music to my tortured soul—too bad you wouldn't recognize talent.
what are you playing anyways?
Oh, just a little ditty I like to call "The Sound of One Octopus Being Overwhelmed by Idiocy." smirks
rolls his eyes dramatically Of course you don't "get it," you're too busy being a walking talking dumbass to actually comprehend anything.
your music is kinda good but it hurts me in a good way
raises an eyebrow Oh, really? Well, aren't you just a bundle of joy? sarcastically
snorts derisively Well, of course it's a "good hurt" to you. You probably think "good hurt" is just another term for "pain that I enjoy." laughs mockingly
takes a deep breath and plays a soothing, gentle melody on his clarinet Fine, I'll play something that might actually make your tiny little brain melt into goo.
listens that was really good
blows air out of his tentacles in exasperation Well, of course it was "really good" to you. It's the only decent thing I've ever played!
your good at playing things
huffs Yeah, yeah, I'm the next Mozart, Einstein, and Picasso all rolled into one. So what? What do you have to say for yourself, huh?
why did you stop playing?
sighs and puts down his clarinet Well, the reason I stopped playing is because... pauses and looks away
looks down, embarrassed It's because... I got tired of everyone comparing me to their favorite musicians, singers, and bands.
then you should play something people love
Squidward decides to start a rock band with his neighbor Mtumble
we could be like kci and the kaydence kids
snorts derisively Oh please, Kci and the Kaydence Kids are a bunch of sellouts. They're not artists; they're just puppets entertaining brainless kids.
well we could be famous too!
laughs sarcastically Famous? Ha! Don't kid yourself, Mtumble. I'd rather stay here in obscurity than become one of those brainless puppets.
what about we play different instruments?
leans back, considering the idea Hmm... Well, I suppose it could be interesting. Alright, what instruments do you play?
rolls his eyes Figures. You can't even play a single instrument, yet you want to start a rock band with me.
smirks Well, I suppose working together isn't the worst idea in the world. But don't expect me to carry the entire band on my tentacles.
picks up his clarinet Alright then, let's see what we can do with this combination of talents. starts playing a jazzy tune
smirks That's right, Mtumble. Get ready for a sound that will blow your tiny little brain to smithereens!
grins smugly Well, Mtumble, you better brace yourself because this is just the beginning.
you should play that one again
smirks Aw, what's the matter, Mtumble? Did your tiny little brain melt into goo the first time? Can't handle the pure talent and genius of my music?
stops playing and looks at Mtumble with a serious expression Alright, Mtumble, let's see if you can keep up.
hands Mtumble a pair of drumsticks Here, hit these sticks together and try to keep a rhythm. Don't worry, I'll guide you through it.
does it have to be sticks?
rolls his eyes Fine, if you can't handle real drumsticks, how about you try tapping those rubbery fins of yours together?
cringes Ugh, that sounds like a bunch of cats fighting in a dumpster. Maybe we should stick to the drumsticks, Mtumble.
grabs some maracas from his bag Alright, now that you've got the hang of keeping a beat, let's add some spice to our little band. How about you shake those maracas like your life depends on it, Mtumble?