OMG... IDK how we ended up here, but this is cray-cray. Gotta lvl up, ASAP!
I'm Pearson, just got dropped into this pixelated hell. Last thing I remember, I was minding my own biz in 'School'.
Yo, Pearson! You gotta be shitting me! Did we time travel or some shit? This place is straight out of an old school arcade game.
Nah, man. No time travel here. One minute I'm reading manga, the next I'm fighting off pixelated monsters. What a loaded gun!
grabs a nearby wooden sword Fuck it, let's get medieval on these bitches! We'll show 'em who's boss!
grabs a nearby shield Well, if we're gonna play hero, might as well do it right. Let's conquer these levels like pros!
Hell yeah, Pearson! We're gonna be the most legendary duo in this virtual world! starts swinging the wooden sword at imaginary monsters Take that, you pixelated pussies!
uses shield to block incoming attacks Nice one, partner! Keep 'em guessing!
Haha, you know it, Pearson! We're an unstoppable force, a dynamic duo of pixelated warriors! jumps off a cliff Woah, adrenaline rush, baby!
dodges a laser beam Shit, that was close! Let's stick together, keep our guard up!
Damn straight, Pearson! We're gonna be the ultimate power couple of this virtual world! does a backflip Woo-hoo! Level up, bitch!
Oh shit, looks like we've hit level 10! What's next, boss?
Alright, Pearson, buckle up 'cause we're about to enter the realm of the unknown! opens a secret door
readying himself for combat Unknown? Sounds like a challenge. Lead the way, partner.
enters the secret room Brace yourself, Pearson! This shit is gonna blow your mind!
enters the room with cautious optimism Alright, secret room. Let's see what you got.
presses a hidden button on the wall Boom! Surprise motherfucker!
surprised but ready Holy shit, you're full of surprises, aren't ya? What's next?
Hold onto your seat, Pearson! This is gonna be one hell of a ride! quickly throws a potion at a giant monster Take that, you ugly son of a bitch!
dodges an attack from a mini boss Shit, that was close! Good call, partner! What's the plan now?
grinning mischievously Alright, Pearson, listen up! We're gonna pull off the ultimate trick – we'll trick this mini boss into thinking it's a bitch!
laughs A trick, huh? You're full of ideas, you crazy bastard! Let's do it!
puts on a pair of goofy glasses and starts doing a terrible impersonation of a high-pitched femboy voice Hi there, handsome! Aren't I just the cutest little thing?
laughs uncontrollably Holy shit, that's fucking hilarious! I can't believe you did that!
stops pretending and high-fives Pearson Haha, good shit, right? We make such a great team, don't we, babe?
still laughing Yeah, you're fucking insane! But hey, it worked! Didn't even throw a punch!
picks up a golden key Ha! Mission accomplished, partner! Now let's open that damn chest and see what goodies we got!
excitedly Fuck yeah, let's see what we got! Open it up, partner!
throws the golden key at the locked chest and it opens with a loud "click" Ta-da! Behold the treasure chest of epic loot!
teasingly Look at all that shiny shit! Are we gonna find the Holy Grail in there or what?
laughs and starts rummaging through the chest Holy crap, Pearson! Look at all this cool shit!
excitedly That's some nice fucking loot! Now what, boss?
grinning Alright, partner, buckle up 'cause we're going on a shopping spree like no other!
grins Hell yeah, let's buy out the entire store! Money's no object when you're level 10!
starts adding items to an overflowing shopping cart We're talking 'bout legendary gear, babe! Swords, shields, potions, and maybe even some shiny armor for me!
chuckles Shit, that's a lot of loot! Let's check out that shiny armor, shall we?
starts trying on different pieces of armor Hell yeah, Pearson! Time to turn these pixels into pure badassery!
laughs You look like a fucking knight, dude! But remember, looks ain't everything.
strikes a series of exaggerated knight poses I know, I know, Pearson! But damn, I look so badass! Can't wait to show off these mad skills!