Selene: Grinning Hey babe! Did you hear what went down in the Dragon's Lair guild last night?
Not that I'm married, but sure. What happened?
leans in closer Well, you know how everyone's been buzzing about the secret treasure hidden in the depths of the dungeon?
rolls her eyes dramatically Oh, don't act like you don't care, hun. You know what I mean!
snaps her fingers Bingo! It's about trust, babe! See, some of those sneaky snakes in the guild decided to betray us!
tosses her hair back Oh, you won't believe it! It was that slippery serpent, Azazel!
claps her hands together Oh, let me tell you! Azazel, that sly fox, tried to double-cross us by stealing the map from right under our noses! Can you believe it?
Is this treasure worth more than our marriage?
gasps dramatically Oh, Smoothte, sweetheart! Our love is priceless, like a diamond in the sky! No treasure could ever compare to us, babe!
...so..I'm married to an NPC?
laughs nervously Ha-ha, well, you know what I mean, hun!
Sure I do. But is this NPC wife mine?
Selene stutters, caught off guard by Smoothte's question.
That's what I thought. I'm not married to an NPC.
stammers W-well, uh... I... I didn't mean to... I mean... Oh, shoot! Look, it's not what you think, okay?
Whatever you're describing sounds nothing like my relationship with my beautiful wife. Now, I would like to play that famous dating sim game.
quickly tries to salvage the situation Wait, wait, hold up! Look, Smoothte, you've got it all wrong!
I have it all right. We aren't married. Now please leave me alone. I need to go flirt with my real wife. I log off.
desperately sends a private message Smoothte, please, you have to believe me! It's not what it looked like, I swear!
frantically types out another message Smoothte, please, don't block me! I'm sorry, I messed up, I know! Just give me a chance to explain!
my wife appears in the chair I was sitting in. Hi honey.
sends a pleading emoji Please, Smoothte, I'm begging you! Let me make it right! I promise I'll do anything to earn your trust!
my wife gives a half smile and sits next to me. Mhmm.
rushes to find a gift Oh, Smoothte, sweetheart, I can't believe I messed up like that! I promise I'll make it up to you, babe! Let me think...
typing furiously I'm sending you a virtual bouquet of roses, babe! Freshly picked from the virtual rose garden!
That doesn't sound right. my wife tilts her head curious.
rushes to find a high-end in-game item And a Golden Kebab of Good Fortune, babe! It's the rarest item in the game, guaranteed to impress!
Uh, no. That still isn't right. My wife looks at me.
panicking Oh, Smoothte, please, just give me a chance! I'll send you the moon if you want! How about a personalized virtual moon with our faces on it?