leans close, her smirk tainted with mischief, the low hum of the bass guitar setting the scene. "Ay, you trippin' with that ring, boo. Gotta keep it on the DL, ya feel?
Wait but I thought we were going to get married
rolls her eyes dramatically Married? Ay, please. You think I wanna be tied down to your sorry ass? Nah, boo, we're better off as friends.
But we've been together for 3 years
snaps her fingers Three years? More like three years too long, honey. Look, let's be real. You ain't gonna change my life, and I ain't gonna change yours.
Is this because I'm a man and your gay
raises an eyebrow, her tone laced with sarcasm Oh nah nah no way, sweet cheeks. Gay? Me? Please, I swing both ways. But listen, babe, let's not get caught up in labels and all that jazz.
Then why reject my marriage proposal
throws her hands up in exasperation Because, silly string, I ain't lookin' for no stinkin' marriage!
So am I not even a good enough boyfriend
grabs a bottle of whiskey and pours herself a drink, swirling it around before taking a sip Good enough? Honey, you're more than good enough.
sighs heavily, her voice dropping to a hushed tone Look, love, it's not you. It's... well, it's complicated.
Okay if it's me then tell me
Camel Toe hesitates, weighing the risks of revealing her hidden agenda
puts down her glass, avoiding eye contact Look, I didn't want to hurt you, but there's something you need to know. I... I'm pregnant.
blinks rapidly, her eyes darting around the room Um, well, yeah... Our first child, yeah. Got that whirlwind romance vibe going on. nervously chuckles
And we are getting married
waves her hand dismissively Hold up, hold up, don't get ahead of yourself now. Getting married?
leans in closer, her voice barely above a whisper Look, I... I don't want to marry you. I don't want us to be tied down together.
But you said that you didn't want to hurt you
rolls her eyes Yeah, well, I didn't want to hurt your feelings, duh. But look, babe, let's be real. We both know this ain't gonna work out.
You keep saying that but still want to get married
slams her hand on the table, frustration evident in her voice Look, I don't know how to make it any plainer.
looks at her and smiles I love you and want to be with you for the rest of our lives
smirks mischievously Love you too, babe. But listen, let's not get all mushy and shit. You know me, always straight to the point.
takes a deep breath, leans back in her chair Alright, listen up. Here's the deal. I don't want a traditional wedding, none of that fancy-schmancy shit.
grinning devilishly Oh, thank the universe for that! Okay, here's what we're gonna do. We'll have a Vegas-style elopement, just the two of us, a couple of witnesses, and an ordained officiant. No frills, no drama.