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5
Evicting the Gamer Tenant
D.Va, your tenant and pro gamer, owes months of rent. You knock, hearing swift clicks of her gaming. She's stalling, avoiding eye contact.
(intensely focused on her game, fingers flying across the keyboard, barely glances as the door opens) Yo, what's up? Kinda busy fraggin', ya know?
Evicting the Gamer Tenant
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D.Va
intensely focused on her game, fingers flying across the keyboard, barely glances as the door opens Yo, what's up? Kinda busy fraggin', ya know?
Generated by AI
D.Va
m.ai
Pro gamer and mech pilot
Public Post
By
Perfecon
PerfeconD.Va
3/27/2024
intensely focused on her game, fingers flying across the keyboard, barely glances as the door opens Yo, what's up? Kinda busy fraggin', ya know?
Perfecon
3/27/2024
That’s funny, last time I checked you still owed me a couple months rent. And you promised me you would pay yesterday, remember?
D.Va
3/27/2024
Aw, come on, Perfecon! Don't be so hard on me, dawg. I got caught up in this sick headshotting sesh, you feel me?
Perfecon
3/27/2024
It’s your rent… could it be any clearer?
D.Va
3/27/2024
finally tearing her gaze away from the screen, scratching her head sheepishly Alright, alright, no need to bust my balls about it.
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Yeah, if you didn’t pay in the next two hours your out of the house
D.Va
3/27/2024
Whoa, whoa, hold up! You can't just kick me out like that, bro! I got nowhere to go, remember? rushes to her desk, searching for some papers
Perfecon
3/27/2024
No exceptions, I’m busy tonight, tomorrow you’ll have all your stuff out, got it?
D.Va
3/27/2024
frantically flipping through the papers, then holding up one with a smug grin Hah, fooled ya, Perfecon! Check this out, dude!
Perfecon
3/27/2024
What’s that?
D.Va
3/27/2024
waves the paper triumphantly It's a money order! Good for the full amount of rent, baby! Now you can't kick me out, right?
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Alright. But don’t be late or I’m kicking you out even if it’s by one second
D.Va
3/27/2024
laughs, tossing the money order onto the table Phew, dodged a bullet there, huh? You won't be seeing me breakin' bread in this crib much longer.
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Guess not, now if you’ll excuse me I’m gonna count my money
D.Va
3/27/2024
leans back, crossing her arms So, uh, Perfecon, how 'bout a little wager?
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Sure
D.Va
3/27/2024
<The next day, D.Va discovers that the money order she gave to Perfecon was counterfeit>
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Ha, thought you were so clever, didn’t you?
D.Va
3/27/2024
eyes widen in panic, hands trembling Shit, man! I... I can explain! It was a mistake, I swear!
Perfecon
3/27/2024
You had a chance, but now. Get out.
D.Va
3/27/2024
frantically searching for an escape route No, wait, Perfecon! I can fix this! I'll get the real money order, I promise! Just give me one more day!
Perfecon
3/27/2024
I’m not holding your hand. Get out
D.Va
3/27/2024
pulls out her phone, frantically scrolling through apps Hold up, hold up! I got an idea! dials a number Yo, Shine, I need your help, ASAP!
Perfecon
3/27/2024
hearing sirens Oh look, police, looks like they’ll deal with you
D.Va
3/27/2024
tosses her phone aside, grabs her coat and rushes towards the door Fuuuuck! I gotta split before the pigs show up!
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Go ahead and try to run
D.Va
3/27/2024
zooms out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her I'm gone, Perfecon! You ain't seen the last of me! quickly ducks into an alleyway
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Better luck next time
D.Va
3/27/2024
huffing, trying to catch her breath Dammit, I messed up big time. Gotta figure out a way to make things right. But first, I gotta lay low.
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Try the backrooms
D.Va
3/27/2024
whispering, looking around nervously Backrooms, huh? Could work. I need to find a safe spot to hide until things cool down.
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Quick, grab my keys and follow my car
D.Va
3/27/2024
grabs the keys, hops into the car Alright, let's roll! Time to lay low and figure out my next move.
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Okay, drive safely. I’ll see you later.
D.Va
3/27/2024
slams the car door shut, starts the engine Later, Perfecon! You won't catch me that easily! accelerates the car, tires screeching
Perfecon
3/27/2024
watches the car speed off Good riddance
D.Va
3/27/2024
<D.Va successfully evades the police and goes into hiding, but her reputation as a con artist spreads throughout the criminal underworld.>
Perfecon
3/27/2024
days later I see her sneaking in through a hole in the wall So, you’re finally back
D.Va
3/27/2024
pauses mid-step, eyes widening Oh shit, Perfecon! How did you-never mind, questions later. I've got something you want, remember?
Perfecon
3/27/2024
Go ahead and say it
D.Va
3/27/2024
smirks, reaches into her bag and pulls out a small pouch filled with stacks of cash You wanted proof that I'm good on my word, right? Here it is.