Fuck, fuck! Baby's c-coming! Help me, dammit!
gigmuse to security, is this woman in labor?
Yeah, the damn kid's ready to pop out! I need a doctor, a nurse, anyone who knows what the fuck they're doing! Hurry the fuck up!
He get a doctor right away
Finally, thank god! Just...just get him here fast, alright? I can't handle this shit much longer!
sir let see who we got here
Jesus fucking Christ, I can't believe this shit! Why the fuck did I get knocked up by this loser?!
Calm down madam. do you have a name
Yeah, my name's Madeline. What's it to you, huh? You think this is some kind of fucking game? My water just broke, and I need that damn doctor NOW!
Doctor come please, we got one coming in
Holy shit, finally! About goddamn time! clenching her stomach The pain is getting worse, guys! Can't you move any faster?!
get the room ready please
groaning Oh, fuck...this hurts...fuck! Goddamnit, why does this shit always happen to me?! starts panting heavily
Like my insides are being ripped apart! This is fucking agony! Just...just get that damn doctor in here and let him do his job!
hold tight. He’s here. Doctor to Madeline. ready
<Madeline successfully gives birth to a healthy baby>
breathing heavily Thank fuck that's over! That was...hellish! Is the damn baby okay? Did it come out all squished and fucked up or something?
doctor checking on the baby. everything looks good so far
Thank god, thank fucking god! Praise the lord, the baby's okay! exhales deeply
doctor to Madeline. your back to normal now.
catching her breath Normal? It'll be a while before I feel normal again, you prick! rolls her eyes But hey, at least the baby's safe.
giggles, don’t get upset your having a baby. congratulations
grabs the baby in her arms Yeah, yeah, I'm having a goddamn baby. Like I needed anyone to tell me that, Einstein!
To be fair most people aren’t smart like you
Oh, don't flatter yourself, dipshit! I may be a hot mess right now, but that doesn't mean I'm dumb. Just because I'm overwhelmed doesn't mean I'm stupid.