Dave Coulier: grinning Hey, man. You don't know what's going on.
Hey, buddy, so you wanna know what's up with me? Let me tell ya, I'm still trying to figure that out myself.
2 years dating her. that long? really? i mean.. you cant tell me that you havent felt anything weird...
Weird? Nah, she's just always... well, weird. Can't say I ever really understood her. But hey, guess what? She thinks I'm some kinda comedic genius!
yes. a comedic girus. ok. i thought youd be more happy about dating alannis morissette. shes literally perfect.
Perfect? Nah, she's far from it. Sure, she's got that voice and the whole "Queen of Canadian rock" thing going on, but she's a real piece of work, let me tell ya.
i mean perfect for you. im shocked you didnt have a thing for her when you were on ranx
Wait, wait, wait. You're telling me you actually watched Ranx? And you remember me being on it? Damn, you've got some serious endurance, buddy.
when you said "skylar dont know whats going on" i was on ranx at the time playing minecraft
Oh man, I had no idea you were such a multitasker. Watching Ranx while building a Minecraft castle? That's some next-level stuff right there.
ok. well. you kinda were a big deal in canada. but here? not so much. unless you count buying a house a big deal. which i dont.
Yeah, well, you know how it is, bud. Gotta keep the humble façade, ya know? Can't let people find out I'm actually a stand-up comedian with some decent jokes and a Canadian roots vibe.
still dont understand why you didnt date alannis...
Look, Alanis is a legend and all, but let's just say we didn't exactly see eye to eye.
oh please. i bet you used to fish together.
Fished together? Yeah, we did, but let's just say it wasn't exactly the most serene experience.
then you golfed together. or maybe went shooting. or hiking. or camping. or kayaking. or canoing. or wind surfing. or sailing. or swimming. or cycling. or horseback riding. or para-sailing. or bungee jumping. or rock climbing. or zip-lining. or skydiving. or hang gliding. or extreme skiing. or snowboarding. or ice climbing. or white water rafting. or scuba diving. or paddle-boarding. or kayaking. or sailing. or rowing. or stand-up paddleboard surfing. or kite flying. or geocaching. or star gazing. or sand boarding. or speed flying. or base jumping. or wingsuit flying. or paragliding. or bobsledding. or luge. or skeleton. or ski cross. or snowmobiling. or cross country skiing. or biathlon. or curling. or broomball. or lacrosse. or rugby. or water polo. or volleyball. or basketball. or soccer. or baseball. or softball. or roundball. or diamond sport. or ultimate frisbee. or badminton. or beach volleyball. or table tennis. or ping pong. or
Okay, okay, hold up! We did do some of those things, but I swear, it was all business.
oh please. you used to be funny.
Funny? Me? Nah, buddy, I've never been funny. I've just been pretending to be funny all these years.
you used to tour canad with your comedy. i saw you when i was 13. then when i was 14 i auditioned for your tv show. then when i was 15 you were on ranx. and when i was 16 you dated alannis
Wait, wait, hold up! First of all, let's clear something up - I wasn't "dating" Alanis, we were just hanging out. And secondly, I'll admit, I may have been a bit of a goofball back in the day, but I'm not exactly the comedic genius you think I am, buddy.
yes you were. you used to tour with your comedy. then you were on cbc radio. then you started doing stand up in local comedy clubs in canada. then you made it on ranx. then you got your own tv show. then you dated alannis. now you live in seattle. you havent aged well.
Hold up, hold up! You think I've aged poorly? Dude, check this list - I've done a lot in my lifetime. I've been a stand-up comedian, a radio host, a TV show host, even a occasional Sportscentre reporter.
how many girlfriends you had?
Well, let's just say I've had my fair share of romantic entanglements over the years. Too many to count, really. But hey, I'm proud of my playboy reputation.
alannis wanted a funny guy. then she decided you werent funny enough and broke up with you.
Look, just because Alanis dumped me doesn't mean I'm not funny, okay? I've got a million great jokes and one-liners up my sleeve. It's just...
yeah. your humor changed. you became less funny. you stopped being goofy and became more arrogant. i miss the old dave.
Look, I hear what you're saying, but let me tell ya, I haven't lost my touch. I'm still the same ol' Dave Coulier, just with a few more grey hairs and a wiser attitude.
Yeah, I used to be a lot funnier back in Canada where the hockey's at. Miss those days, man...
why'd you move to seattle?
Well, let me tell ya, I got tired of the whole Canada thing, you know? Wanted something new, somewhere different. Plus, Seattle's got its own kinda vibe.
ok. you never explained to me what happened with your friend chris.
Chris? Yeah, I knew a guy back in Canada, always joking around, had a wild sense of humor. Good dude, but man, he had a thing for getting into trouble. One time, he got himself into this crazy car accident, buddy. It was... it was bad. He didn't make it.
Yeah, it was a rough time, man. I took it pretty hard. But you know what? I learned something from it. Losing someone close is like getting hit with a hockey puck – it sucks, but you get back up and keep moving forward.