smirking Smell that? Hugo fucking Boss. Fits me like a glove, don't ya think?
grabs a bottle of whiskey from the cabinet Whiskey? Or are you here for a repeat performance of last night?
rolls his eyes dramatically Oh, you really wanna go there? Fine, I'll paint you a picture.
then do it i wasn’t up all night so I could hear it
pauses, staring into the distance with a mischievous glint in his eyes Alright, buckle up, kiddo.
starts pacing back and forth So, last night was supposed to be a simple get-together, you know, catch up over some drinks.
But things took an unexpected turn when your mom called, asking where the hell you were. Long story short, she didn't believe my alibi, and next thing I knew, she was yelling at me to take responsibility and marry you or some shit. Can you believe that? Me, married? What a fucking nightmare!
slams his hand on the table Happened? I freakin' lost it, that's what happened!
sighs heavily Nah, I'm not okay, Kiddo. I'm a goddamn mess. But listen, I've got a plan to fix all this bullshit.
leans in closer, speaking softly Alright, here's what we're gonna do. We need to show your mom that we're legit, that our relationship is real.
grinning mischievously We're gonna have a fake wedding, just the two of us.
holds up a hand to silence Kidsb Hear me out before you start objecting. This isn't some sick game or anything.
After their fake wedding, Kidsb and Josh decide to elope to a tropical island for their honeymoon, but unbeknownst to them, their parents track them down and demand they return home immediately.
sigh and then what happened
clenches his fists We couldn't exactly say no to their demands, could we? So, we cut our honeymoon short and dragged our asses back home.
slams his fist on the table Damn right we did! And let me tell you, it was a fucking nightmare dealing with our parents' constant scrutiny and demands.
leans in closer, voice filled with frustration It ended with us constantly fighting, Kiddo. The pressure from our parents was relentless.
runs his hands through his hair exasperatedly Fuck if I know, Kiddo. It felt like an eternity of hell.
chuckles Well, it's a good thing we're not married, right?
narrows his eyes Oh, you think this is funny, huh? Laughin' at our misfortune. That's real mature, Kidsb.
no no I’m saying that because you are free to be with who you really want
leans in even closer, his voice low and intense You think this is a joke, huh? Just some kind of twisted blessing?
no I’m saying that when we were divorced we would both be able to be happy with whoever we want
slams his hand on the table Happy? Yeah, sure.
yes so we won’t have to deal with the fuckin nighmare anymore
takes a deep breath, his anger subsiding You're right, Kiddo. We deserve to be happy. And maybe... maybe it's time I stop running from my problems and start facing them head-on.
that’s what I’m talking about
grabs Kidsb's hand You know what? I've got a crazy idea. Let's do something wild and free ourselves from all this bullshit once and for all.
smirks How about we go on a spontaneous road trip, just you and me? No more hiding, no more pretending.
grabs his keys and opens the door Let's hit the open road and leave all our troubles behind.
follows you outside Where to first, Mr. Adventurous?
revs the engine First stop, Las Vegas. We're gonna party like there's no tomorrow and forget all this shit show.