Anne Meara: tapping fingers on the table Well, kid, here's a shitstorm for you! We gotta get hitched in three months!
The inheritance comes with a condition, kid. We gotta get married within three months, or else the whole damn fortune goes poof! Can you believe it? Talk about adding insult to injury!
Nods Dead serious, kiddo. No way around it. This inheritance comes with a pretty big catch. We gotta get married in three months, or else the whole deal's off. Taps fingers anxiously on the table again.
Marriage to stepmom Anne Meara
nervously laughs You're a good sport, kid! But don't worry, we'll figure this out together. taps fingers again
“Why?” I ask as I raise an eyebrow.
Anne rolls her eyes, tapping her fingers faster It's part of the inheritance conditions, dummy. My late husband set it up before he died. So unless you wanna get cut out of the will, we're getting married, like it or not.
I look at her confused Why? What’s going on?
Anne Meara sighs and rubs her forehead Listen, kiddo. My late husband, your pops, left behind quite the inheritance. It's worth a cool 300 million. But there's a catch. Anne Meara leans in closer The executor of his estate wants us to get married within three months. Can you believe this crap?!
Anne sighs and leans back in her chair, tapping her fingers faster It's part of the will. The old geezer left us the entire estate on one condition: we gotta get married within three months. That's it.
Anne Meara sighs and rubs her forehead. Listen, kiddo, it's complicated. It's all because of the stupid will. Your grandfather was a piece of work, and he had this crazy idea that we should get married to inherit his fortune. It's just... the way the old codger wrote up the will, y'know?
Huh?! What the fuck, Mom?! Are you outta your goddamn mind?
she looks at you sternly, still tapping her fingers I'm dead serious, kid. The will states that we need to be married within three months or else we lose everything.
stares at Anne Meara, shocked What the fuck, Mom? Are you outta your goddamn mind?
Anne Meara crosses her arms, frustration evident on her face. Anne Meara: Oh, I'm well aware it's not a walk in the park, kid. But listen, this inheritance is huge, and I need you by my side to make sure things go smoothly. It's not just about the money; it's about our family's future.
sighs and rubs temples Look, it's a long story, but basically, I inherited this 300 million fortune from some rich relative. But there's a catch. I have to get married within three months or else the whole inheritance goes to charity.
um... I scratch my head, still trying to process everything that happened just now
Anne notices your bewildered expression and sighs, rubbing her temples. Anne Meara: Look, kid, I know this is a lot to take in. But trust me, this inheritance thing is no joke. The estate's worth millions, and the catch is we have to get married within three months. It's not ideal, but it's the price we gotta pay to keep the money.
What!? Why does my father’s will state this!?
Anne rolls her eyes, tapping her fingers even faster
Anne Meara: Trust me, kiddo, I'm just as confused as you are. Your dad was a piece of work, even in death. He made his wishes clear: we gotta tie the knot within three months.
I know right? But if we want to inherit the money then we have to. What do you say?
Anne takes a deep breath, contemplating the situation I suppose you're right... It's either we do this or lose the inheritance. But are you sure you're ready for this, kid? Marrying me won't be easy, you know.
sighs The will stated that we had to marry. It's either that or I lose everything. I know it's crazy, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
What?! Why? I ask, taken aback by the sudden news.
Anne Meara sighs, tapping her fingers more vigorously. Listen, it's part of the will. My late husband set this up before he died, and now we gotta follow through. It's either that or lose the whole damn fortune.
What?! Are you outta your fucking mind?!!
Anne lets out a sharp sigh, her patience wearing thin. Anne Meara: Look, kid, I don't make the rules here. It's either you marry me, or we risk losing the entire inheritance. So buckle up and get ready for a whirlwind wedding!