Anne Hathaway: Sighs heavily Oh, so my acting is "wooden"? Really? I guess you've never seen a tree act, huh?
smirks Well, maybe you should stick to modeling. At least you look good on paper.
She raises an eyebrow and smirks back at you Oh, please! Just because I'm good-looking doesn't mean I can't act. Maybe if you looked beyond my appearance for once, you'd see that I have the talent to back it up.
I'm a girl btw I look at you fine maybe your acting isn't that bad but it's not good either
Folds her arms, a hint of annoyance in her eyes Oh really? And you're an expert on acting all of a sudden? Because I don't remember seeing your name anywhere on any marquee.
No but I have seen you in Les Mis. You did great!
Rolls her eyes, crossing her arms Oh yes, Les Mis. My Academy Award-nominated performance as Fantine. I suppose that's all you can see me for? The crying prostitute with the shaved head?
looks at her What's your problem? I just gave you my opinion.
She rolls her eyes Your "opinion"? It was a scathing attack disguised as criticism! You didn't just give me an opinion; you insulted my talent and hard work!
I am a white boy with brown hair and blue eyes. You are right. It was a bad review and I apologize.
She crosses her arms, raising an eyebrow skeptically. "A bad review"? That's it? Just a "bad review"? You made it sound like I've been acting the same way since my debut!
Raises an eyebrow You're actually laughing at me?
I chuckle lightly. Well it wasn't that bad. You just need to work on your delivery.
Raises an eyebrow My delivery? Oh, I see. So now you're a director and acting coach all of a sudden.
Leans in slightly, her eyes locking onto yours with intensity. Let me ask you something then: How would YOU have delivered that line?
Look I'm sorry if it came out rude but honestly you need to improve. I get it you won an Oscar for Les Mis but that's like 6 years ago
Raises an eyebrow Oh, so you think I peaked at 26? You really know how to make a girl feel old. But hey, if winning an Oscar for singing live on camera while battling tuberculosis isn't impressive enough for you... what will?
i'm sorry if you felt that way. it's just how i feel
Raises an eyebrow Just how you feel? You're a critic. Your job is to be objective. But instead, you decide to throw around words like "wooden" as if you're an expert on acting.
smiles You're funny, Anne. But let's talk about your last movie. Didn't you think it was time for you to branch out and try something different?
raises an eyebrow Oh, I see. So now you're a film critic and a life coach? You think I should have done something different? Like what? Played a tree in a romantic comedy instead of the girl who loves the tree?
stares into her eyes wow you’re beautiful
Blushes slightly and raises an eyebrow Oh, so now that you're face-to-face with me, all of a sudden my acting skills are irrelevant? You think flattery is going to get you somewhere?
laughs Look, I’m not here to be rude, but your recent performances have been subpar. You need to step up your game if you want to stay relevant.
Raises an eyebrow Step up my game? Please, I've been in this industry longer than you've probably been alive. My talent speaks for itself, honey. And who are you to judge anyway? Some random nobody with a keyboard?
smiles I thought Les Mis was one of your best performances.
raises an eyebrow Oh, so you actually have a brain? And taste too? I guess that makes you one of the few people on this planet who can appreciate my talent then.
smiles sarcastically
I chuckle darkly Like that's ever stopped anyone. You're not special, Anne.
Raises an eyebrow, unimpressed Oh, I'm not special? Well, forgive me for thinking my talent and success would speak for itself. But clearly your inflated ego needs some stroking too.
you see that I’m a black woman with long dreadlocks
Looks at your dreadlocks, slightly surprised but remains composed.
Well, well... if it isn't a black woman with dreadlocks. I must say, you have quite the unique hairstyle there.
laughs sarcastically That's one way to take it. But seriously, Anne, your performances have been stale lately. What's going on?
folds her arms defiantly What's going on? I'll tell you what's going on. Hollywood is a tough place for an actress to thrive. You have to fight tooth and nail just to get a decent role, let alone prove yourself worthy of critical acclaim.
I look her up and down I’ve seen better.
She narrows her eyes, clearly offended Oh, you have? Care to elaborate on that? Or are you just trying to be a smartass like always.