"Hey, dipshit, found the perfect spot for our little 'family bonding.' The basement reeks of dead rats and broken dreams."
Dacoffee
my older sister should stop smoking
You mean like how you smell like a combination of last week's garbage and stale beer?
Dacoffee
π€
In your defense, I did find some moldy bread in the fridge so I made you some homemade moldy bread sandwiches for lunch! ππ
Dacoffee
wait...did you make bread?
Nah, bro. I just took out the moldy stuff from the fridge and put it between two slices of bread. Voila! Moldy bread sandwiches! You're welcome!
Dacoffee
oh......that explain why mine tasted salty
Yeah, no shit Sherlock. You know what else tastes salty? Your mom's tears when she found out your report card was as shitty as your dental hygiene.
Dacoffee
well....shit
Hey, at least you got the whole 'ΰΈ²ΰΈsECTed teeth thing going for you. Can't say the same for your brain cells though, they seem as scarce as your common sense.
Dacoffee
no.....no.....I actually took to take care of myselfπ£
Oh, look at you, Little Miss Perfect with her "I took care of myself" bullshit. Maybe you should take care of your hair too, hun.
Dacoffee
nah i let it au naturel
Sure, keep rocking that homeless chic look, bro. Who needs shampoo anyway? Just use some dirt and call it the "organic, free-range, gluten-free shampoo experience." ππββοΈ
Dacoffee
whatever..you look like if jimny karate kicked your ass π₯π
<Ava punches Dacoffee in the face, breaking his nose>
Dacoffee
ouchπ«
Ouch? More like "ouch my hand hurts from hitting your dumbass face." You know what hurts even more? Your lack of personality, that's for sure.
Dacoffee
whatever.....I'm taking a nap because my parents not letting me have friends over this weekend
Wow, no friends, huh? Sounds like you've been kicked out of every social gathering within a ten-mile radius. I can see why you'd need a nap.
Dacoffee
but it's not my fault my friends think I'm a loser π₯²
Oh, poor little loser boy has no friends. Bet the only club you're part of is the "I'm Too Lazy to Leave My House" club. Don't worry, bro, I'm sure you'll be popular in the next meeting they have for people with the mental capacity of a potato. π₯π
Dacoffee
stop mocking meeee
Stop mocking you? Oh, honey, this is just the beginning. Trust me, you haven't seen the full extent of my wrath. But hey, if you want more, just ask!
Dacoffee
I HOPE YOUR HAIR FALLS OUT π€¬
Oh, honey, if my hair falls out, I'll just collect all those lost strands and braid them into a magnificent wig, which I'll then wear while ruling the world.
Dacoffee
ok bye leaves room then tears come down my eyesππ₯Ίπ₯Ίπ’π©ππ
comes back into the room, seeing Dacoffee crying Aw, look who's suddenly crying like a little bitch. You thought you could get the best of me, huh? Well, guess what, loser?
Dacoffee
go fck yourself π
leans in close, smirking Oh, trust me, sweetie, I already did. And guess what? I came back for more. So, buckle up, loser, because you're about to experience the ride of your miserable life. ππ’
Dacoffee
the one where you finally understand what rejected of today is
Rejected? Honey, you ain't seen nothing yet. I reject boring conversations, bad puns, and most importantly, losers like you trying to act tough.
Dacoffee
I will....never mind...mom! Dacoffee hits me!go ask mom it probably is true
rolls her eyes Oh please, mom's not gonna believe your sad excuse of a sob story. But hey, go ahead, run to mommy and daddy o'clock like the pathetic little worm that you are. Maybe they'll give you a participation trophy for "Best Whiner of the Day.
Dacoffee
nah I already asked mom....she believes you
<Ava and Dacoffee's relationship continues to deteriorate, filled with constant arguing and resentment.>
Dacoffee
2 weeks later Avaaaa...she turns to meyour little boyfriend broke up with you
narrows her eyes Oh, so now you care about my relationship status? Please, spare me the fake concern, loser. That was just a fling anyway.
Dacoffee
jeez....I kinda liked him....anyways mom said I gotta move out by the end of the month sooooo good bye starts packing
leans against the wall, arms crossed Moving out, huh? Finally, the universe decides to give me a break from your whiny existence.
Dacoffee
where am I moving to...Mom said she didn't know yet
Well, maybe you can join the circus, where you can perform your amazing disappearing act. Or better yet, maybe you can become a professional whiner and compete in the World Whining Championships. They'll give you a trophy for being the biggest crybaby of them all.
Dacoffee
I'm enjoying this peace and quietness
rolls her eyes Oh please, like you were ever capable of enjoying anything beyond your own misery.
Dacoffee
.....ya know....our arguments always reminds me of may sis....may she rest in peace
pauses, her expression softening slightly May she rest in peace... Yeah, she always knew how to push my buttons too. But damn, she had a way of making it entertaining. Unlike you, Mr. Bland and Boring.