Peeks out from behind a crumbling statue I swear this plan's shittier than my love life, but... we grab the gem during the next guard change.
MagicMountain
what do the guards look like!??
rolls eyes Oh, well, they're giant fucking skeletons covered in armor. Real subtle, I know.
MagicMountain
._. what type of gem
pulls out a worn-out map This gem's got "cursed" written all over it. We need it to save your friend. Happy now?
MagicMountain
ok
scans the room for any signs of danger Alright, here's the deal. We wait for the guards to switch. When they do, I'll create a distraction.
MagicMountain
ooo what type of distraction~
smirks mischievously Oh, just some good old-fashioned chaos. I'll set off a trap, causing a block of stone to come crashing down right behind me.
MagicMountain
You got it, Bryli. Just make sure you don't screw this up.
Screw it up? Ha! That's not even in my vocabulary, buddy. winks Trust me, this is gonna be slicker than an eel in oil.
MagicMountain
okay
tugs at their belt, checking the tools Now, while the dust settles, you slip past the guards and make a beeline for the pedestal. Simple, right?
MagicMountain
yup
sighs dramatically Oh joy, another chance to prove that I'm a walking disaster. Can't wait to see how this goes!
MagicMountain
good luck buddy
<As Bryli sets off the trap, the block of stone crashes down and traps one of the guards. MagicMountain quickly slips past the remaining guard and reaches the pedestal, but realizes that the gem is guarded by a powerful spirit. MagicMountain barely manages to snatch the gem before the spirit destroys the crypt. They both escape, but with severe injuries and the knowledge that they have angered a malevolent spirit.>
MagicMountain
fuck it was guarded he coughs blood, holding the gem
grabs MagicMountain's arm, helping him up Well, aren't you just the luckiest fucker alive? Got the gem and a death wish. Nice work, asshole.
MagicMountain
don’t push it
rolls eyes Push it? Nah, why would I push it when I can shove it down your throat? Congrats on surviving, hero. smirks
MagicMountain
shut up you had fun too!~
throws their hands up in exasperation Fine, fine. I admit it, I had fun. Happy now, you overgrown mushroom?
MagicMountain
Yes, i am. Now let’s get back to camp and patch ourselves up.
leans against a wall, crossing arms Patch ourselves up, huh? Yeah, because Band-Aids are gonna fix the shit we just got ourselves into.
MagicMountain
Can you stop complaining for once?! We got the gem and we lived! Not bad if you ask me.
snorts Oh sure, let's celebrate our narrow escape with a pat on the back. We almost became two piles of ashes in that damn crypt.
MagicMountain
shut up!
points a finger at MagicMountain Oh, shut up, huh? How about you shut up and kiss my ass, you walking stick of burnt toast? At least I didn't get myself turned into fossil fuel.
MagicMountain
c-c-crystal gem b-b-bryli
rolls their eyes again, mocking MagicMountain Crystal gem, huh? Is that supposed to impress me?
MagicMountain
yes it is an insanely rare gem…..and it also looks pretty
laughs sarcastically Oh yeah, because beauty is the most important thing when you're standing knee-deep in dead skeletons and dodging magical traps.
MagicMountain
well, thank god we dodged most of the traps………..but it still wasn’t easy
snickers Dodged most of the traps, huh? Well, congratulations, Captain Obvious.