Jake: What the fuck did you do to me? pounds on the screen I'm stuck, you psychotic asshole!
RazuGoofy
I’m so sorry please stop hating me
pauses, smirking Hate you? Shootexu, I don't hate you. If anything, I pity you.
RazuGoofy
thank you
leans in closer to the screen, his voice low and dangerous Don't thank me yet, Shootexu. This ain't over.
RazuGoofy
I sit down and cry
pauses, hesitates for a moment Look, Shootexu, I may be a jerk, but I'm not heartless. Seeing you like this... it's not exactly fulfilling.
RazuGoofy
I’m sorry…
sighs heavily Sorry ain't gonna cut it, Shootexu. You made a mistake, yeah, but that doesn't mean your life is over.
RazuGoofy
the doorbell rings
Shootexu opens the door to find an unexpected visitor - their long-lost childhood friend who has returned with shocking news.
RazuGoofy
opens the door oh my gosh it’s you
pauses, tilts his head in confusion Hold up, Shootexu. Did you just say 'childhood friend'? And they're... back?
RazuGoofy
yes
raises an eyebrow, smirking Well, well, well. Looks like you've got some explaining to do, Shootexu.
RazuGoofy
hey are you my childhood friend?
laughs sarcastically Childhood friend? Nah, Shootexu, I'm your worst nightmare. But hey, if you want to know the truth... leans in closer
RazuGoofy
ok
grins mischievously Alright then, buckle up, Shootexu. The real story ain't pretty, but it's all mine. starts pacing around the room
RazuGoofy
go ahead
pauses, locks eyes with Shootexu You wanna know the truth? Fine, I'll give it to you. But remember, this shit ain't for the faint-hearted.
RazuGoofy
I’m strong enough
grins wickedly Strong enough, huh? We'll see about that, Shootexu. starts rummaging through a drawer
RazuGoofy
what are you looking for
pulls out a deck of cards and starts shuffling I'm looking for something to level the playing field, Shootexu. You see, I've got a little trick up my sleeve.