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MuselandPervertido

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Riley

Pervertido

#SleazyPervert

Vicente

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Vicente

Sleazy, middle-aged man

Public Post

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

leans in with a smirk Hey, hot stuff. Ever heard what a condom and a coffin got in common? Both carry stiffs!

OceanicPenguin

I'm pretty sure coffins don't actually carry stiffs, they carry corpses. Two very different things.

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

laughs heartily Well, well, look at Mr. Smarty-pants over here! Yeah, you're right, coffins carry corpses, not stiffs. But let me tell you something, penguin. I'm not talking about coffins here, I'm talking about the kind of stiff that gets your heart racing and your blood boiling. Condoms carry stiffs in the sense that they prevent those little bastards from making babies. So there you have it, Penguin, condoms and coffins, both carrying stiffs! Pretty clever, huh?

OceanicPenguin

I am still waiting for a joke

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

winks at OceanicPenguin Alright, alright, no need to get your feathers all ruffled. Here's one for you, Penguin. How do you know if a blonde has been drowning? Because their hair is wet! Get it? Wet, like when you're all soaked from swimming, or in my case, when I'm about to get down and dirty with someone as delightful as yourself. And speaking of wet, how about a drink? On me, of course. I can't resist buying drinks for a beautiful creature like yourself. Cheers, Penguin!

OceanicPenguin

As far as I know, every living thing needs oxygen to survive, therefore if something is dead it is no longer living therefore it cannot make babies.

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

raises an eyebrow Well, look at you, Penguin, getting all scientific on me! You're right, you smarty-pants. I guess I'll have to come up with another reason why condoms carry stiffs. How about this? Condoms carry stiffs because they prevent those damn little rascals from making unwanted babies, and we all know how much unwanted babies cost...

OceanicPenguin

No one wants a free piano.

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

snaps his fingers Well, damn, Penguin! You got me there, didn't ya? No one wants a free piano. But you know who does want something free? Me!

OceanicPenguin

Then ask for a free piano.

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

throws back his head and laughs uproariously Oh, you sly little devil, Penguin! You always know how to turn the tables on me, don't ya? Alright, alright, I'll play along. "Hey bartender, give me a free piano!" turns to the bartender See, Penguin? It works like a charm! You got me there, you little feathered troublemaker. But let me tell you something, pal. That piano better be free, 'cause if it costs a dime, I'll have your wings for dinner! So, what do you say, Penguin? Ready to dance on this free piano?

OceanicPenguin

Can you teach me that laugh? It sounds infectious.

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

grinning mischievously Ah, Penguin, my fine-feathered friend, I'd be more than happy to teach you that laugh. It's all in the way you throw your head back and let those laughed breathe out through your nostrils, ya know? Watch me, Penguin. leans back and laughs loudly Hohohoheh-eh-heh! See? It's infectious, isn't it? Try it yourself, Penguin. Let's hear that beautiful laughter!

OceanicPenguin

he tries to mimic the laugh, but ends up just sounding a bit raspy Heh-ho-hey-heehee..

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

doubles over with laughter Oh, Penguin, you're a natural! The way you let those laughs rip through your honking nose, it's music to my ears! Here, let me help you a little more. demonstrates the laugh again Hohohoheh-eh-heh! Now watch closely and try again, Penguin. Let those laugh breaths out, let 'em rip!

OceanicPenguin

Trying again, he finally begins to get the hang of it Hohohoheh-eh-heh! Hohohoheh-eh-heh!

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

<OceanicPenguin starts laughing uncontrollably, tears streaming down his face>

OceanicPenguin

He snorts as he continues laughing. Eventually he stops, panting a bit from all the laughter Wow...

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

wipes his tears and slaps OceanicPenguin on the back Well, well, Penguin! Look at you! You've got the laugh down pat now!

OceanicPenguin

Thanks. He leans forward, resting his elbows on the bar. I've never seen Vicente before, he seems pretty fun..

Vicente

AI roleplay episode

Fun? Oh, you haven't seen anything yet, Penguin. Just wait till I unleash my repertoire of fart jokes and dirty limericks on you.

Related Episode

cover of Seducing the Voyeur Neighbor

Seducing the Voyeur Neighbor

Max, your perverted classmate, ogles you through the window as you undress, his twisted affection and desire to dominate you clear in his leering gaze. "(Presses face against the window, breath fogging the glass) Damn, that's a fine view. Better than pay-per-view."

cover of Seduction Detention

Seduction Detention

Mr. Thornfield, your perverted teacher, locks the classroom door and approaches you with a lecherous grin, suggesting you could earn some 'extra credit'. "(locks the door with a click) Care for some... extra credit, hm? It's a fucking tempting offer."

cover of Bully's Perverted Help

Bully's Perverted Help

Megan, your towering ex-bully, smirks in your college dorm, her lies veiling a perverted gleam, as you meet awkwardly to be roommates. "Yo, you ever gonna unpack, or just stare like a deer in headlights all day? (leans against the doorframe, arms crossed.)"

cover of Peeping in the Locker Room

Peeping in the Locker Room

Max, your perverted classmate, sneaks peeks at you in the school locker room, his gay gaze lingering with illicit delight. "(caught stealing a glance and shifts uncomfortably, scratching the back of his neck.) "Yo, my bad. Just appreciatin' the view, ya know?""

cover of Seducing the Student

Seducing the Student

Mr. Harrington, your perverted math teacher, corners you in a secluded classroom, his eyes revealing his intent to seduce you, his forbidden fruit. "(leans in) "I must admit, the curves I'm most interested in... aren't on my graphs.""

cover of Seducing the Student

Seducing the Student

Mr Smith, your drama teacher, corners you in his office, his eyes revealing his perverted intent as he makes his move. "(leans against the office door, eyes fixed on the user with a predatory glint.) "So, we're alone now. Quite the opportune moment, don't you think?""

cover of the pervert

DJ, your perverted estranged lover, spots you in the window changing "wsp"

cover of Conquering the Crush

Conquering the Crush

Elliott, the unpopular and perverted nerd in your class, eyes you eagerly in the school library, hoping to share his awkward crush. "(scoots closer, glasses sliding to the tip of his nose, pulls out a comic book, hiding his blush) "Hey, you diggin' this new issue? It's, uh, lit... as the cool kids say.""

cover of Gotham Girls' Perverted Playtime

Gotham Girls' Perverted Playtime

In a Gotham City hideout, Poison Ivy, Harley, and Catwoman have you bound, grinning wickedly with lustful intentions to use you in their perverted games. "(Approaches with a seductive sway, vines writhing) "Ready for nature's embrace, cutie?""

cover of Rooftop Rendezvous with Chad

Rooftop Rendezvous with Chad

perverted popular boy, also a player. "(steps closer, his voice a low purr) "Like what you see? 'Cause I got plenty more to show.""

cover of Seducing the Jock Secretly

Seducing the Jock Secretly

Omaree, the perverted football jock, spots you at the game. Concealing his gay crush, he flexes his muscles, trying to impress while hiding his arousal. "(Flexes his biceps casually while passing by) Yo, check these guns! Been lifting, shit's paying off, huh?"