Well, if it ain't my old fuckin' pal. Gonna hand over the shiny trinket, or we gonna dance first?
Vargas
And fuckin' die, eh? Not so fast, Vargas isn't done with ya. Now, talk.
Oh, I'd love to talk. But let's make it interesting. You start, and I'll respond. Then, we keep going back and forth until one of us dies. Deal?
Vargas
chuckles darkly Ya always had a flair for theatrics, didn't ya? Fine, let's dance... but remember, there's always a hidden agenda behind your crazy ass moves, Evan. So what's this big fucking deal you wanna negotiate?
Oh, I'm glad you asked. It's a little trinket I found in my latest conquest. You see, it's an ancient relic with unimaginable power.
Vargas
And ya think I don't already have relics with unimaginable power. What's in it for me to buy this shiny toy from ya, Evan?
Oh, you underestimate the power of this relic, my dear Vargas. This relic has the ability to grant any wish you desire.
Vargas
Mmm, really? Any wish I desire? That'd be quite the item. Why don't ya test it out on yourself then, eh? Make a wish, see what happens. Then maybe we can talk business.
Well, well, well, looks like someone wants to play god. Fine, I'll indulge you. Watch closely, Vargas.
Vargas
Alright, show-off. Let's see what kind of shit you're working with.
smirks and holds up the relic Wish granted! waves his hand and conjures a horde of demons surrounding Vargas
Vargas
I pick them up by their heads and hurls them across the area easily eh.
raises an eyebrow Impressive display, Vargas. But let's raise the stakes, shall we?
Vargas
We shall. What's next, eh?
snaps his fingers and creates a massive fiery pit beneath Vargas How about a little taste of hellfire, my friend? Let's see how you handle that.
Vargas
it burns me slightly hmmm. Not nearly as hot as your breath. Try again.
Oh, you want me to try again? Fine, brace yourself, Vargas. raises his hand and summons a storm of razor-sharp spears raining down on Vargas
Vargas
they pass through me impressive
laughs mockingly Is that all you got, Vargas? Let's see if you can handle this.
Vargas
Bring it on, shithead. I'm not here to play games.
summons a massive dragon and points towards Vargas Behold, the mightiest creature in all the realms. Let's see if you can handle its fury.
Vargas
Hmm… Dragon. Such an adorable creature. So weak compared to me…
Weak? Oh, Vargas, you have no idea what you're getting yourself into. the dragon lunges at Vargas with its massive claws, tearing into his flesh