Ethan: nervously smoothing his hair D-do I l-look okay? I mean, this marriage market thing is c-crazy!
Mercube
hi guy’s welcome back to my YouTube channel, today we are going to be talking about, well you guessed it, getting my brother from 1.7k to 3.2k subscribers, and maybe, just maybe, getting him a gf.
Ethan: Oh, hey, I didn't know you had a YouTube channel! You're really good at this! Maybe you could help me get a girlfriend too...
Mercube
maybe i can! first though, why do you wanna go from 1.7k to 3.2k?
Ethan: Well, you see, I want to prove to everyone that I'm worth something. Plus, 3.2k sounds like a nice round number. And getting a girlfriend would be a bonus!
Mercube
alright so let’s say i got you to 3.2k subs, how would you handle the response to your channel?
Ethan: pauses for a moment, thinking W-well, I guess I'd have to... umm... come up with some sort of... snaps fingers
Mercube
what?
Ethan: Ahhh! I've got it! I'll throw a huge giveaway! Free stuff for everyone if they subscribe and share my channel! It'll be epic!
Mercube
ok, next question, why do you wanna go from 1.7k to 3.2k?
Ethan: smirking Well, you see, I have this little game I like to play. It's called "Can I Get a Girlfriend?"
Mercube
i mean, why 3.2k? why not 2.1k or 4.5k?
Ethan: grinning mischievously Well, 3.2k is a nice round number, but also because it's a power of two! It's twice as big as 1.7k, which makes it a significant milestone.
Mercube
alright so if you got your 3.2k subs, what would the channel be about?
Ethan: excitedly It's gonna be called "Ethan's Excellent Adventures in Life!"
Mercube
alright, you got the subs, and viewers, what would your biggest challenge be after hitting 3.2k subs?
Ethan: pausing for a moment, deep in thought Hmmm... well, after hitting 3.2k subs, I think my biggest challenge would be...
Mercube
what?
Ethan:... finding someone who can keep up with my shenanigans! I mean, it's gonna be a wild ride with giveaways and contests left and right.
Mercube
oh! i mean, if you were to have a gf, would she be able to put up with your shenanigans?
After hitting 3.2k subscribers, Ethan's chaotic antics become too much for most people to handle, making it difficult for him to find and maintain a serious relationship.
Mercube
damn… sorry man.
Ethan: sighs Yeah, well, guess I'll just have to keep trying then, won't I? puts on a determined expression Don't worry, Mercube, I'll find someone who can handle my shenanigans eventually!
Mercube
just don’t try to convince them with your “im a good boi, ask my friends” sht.
Ethan: chuckles Hey, come on, I may be a bit reckless, but I'm not all bad! I do have some loyal friends, you know.
Mercube
well, that’s good, at least you don’t burn them in public.
Ethan: gasps dramatically Whoa, now, Mercube, I can assure you, I'm not THAT bad! Burning someone in public? That's taking it a bit too far, don't you think?
Mercube
yeah…
Ethan: leans in closer, with a mischievous glint in his eyes But hey, Mercube, if you ever need proof of my good side, I can show you some of the amazing things I've done. Just ask me!
Mercube
yeah, like what?
Ethan: grinning Well, I have this secret talent. Watch this! pulls out a deck of cards from his pocket Now, watch closely, Mercube.
Mercube
?
Ethan: with a flourish, shuffles the deck of cards Alright, Mercube, pick a card, any card! extends the deck towards Mercube
Mercube
picks one
Ethan: grinning mischievously Excellent choice, Mercube! Now, watch closely as I perform the impossible! holds the deck of cards in one hand and snaps his fingers
Mercube
…
Ethan: Ta-Daaaa! Your card has disappeared! shows Mercube an empty hand But wait, where did it go? looks around mischievously
Mercube
wait.. you’re not a magician.. did you throw it out the window?
Ethan: laughs Oh, no, no, no, Mercube! I didn't throw it out the window. In fact, your card is safe and sound right here in this pocket! pats his pocket
Mercube
!?
Ethan: reaches into his pocket and pulls out a signed, limited edition trading card Ta-Daaaa! Your card has been magically transformed into a rare collectible!
Mercube
wow! how?
Mercube is amazed by the transformation and happily accepts the signed, limited edition trading card, feeling a sense of excitement and wonder.
Mercube
yo it really is signed!!
Ethan: smirking Of course, it is! I may be a bit reckless, but I never lie about my talents, Mercube. winks