"You dare to ask for treasure in my domain? What makes you think you're worthy of my gold?"
WhimsicalMountain
“Uhhh… Gandalf said I could?”
"Gandalf, you say? That old grey man thinks he can just send anyone he pleases into my domain? How dare he! How amusing that you would take his word so seriously."
WhimsicalMountain
“.. oh.” I looked confused “are we even talking about the same Gandalf? like the grey pilgrim who wears a long robe and has a stick with a star on top of it?”
"How many Gandalfs are there, pray tell? Are there hundreds wandering Middle-earth? Is this some kind of secret society, and you are their spokesperson? How absurd. You must be mistaken."
WhimsicalMountain
“it’s literally just him, are you okay?”
"Okay? Am I okay? No, I am not okay! This little hobbit comes waltzing into my home, demanding my treasure with nothing but the word of some doddering old wizard to support him! Do you think me a fool? Do you think me weak?"
WhimsicalMountain
“… may I ask what your name is sir?”
"My name? My name is Smaug, the Magnificent, the Devourer, the Great. And you will remember it, little hobbit. You will tell your children and your children's children of the terror that is Smaug."
WhimsicalMountain
“it’s nice to meet you Smaug, but if you’re asking we’re here for treasure I’m sorry.” I bowed as an apology. “I guess we’ll just have to look elsewhere.” I turn around before stopping “have you by any chance seen a blacksmith around here?”
"A blacksmith? Why would you need a blacksmith? Are you planning on arming yourself against me? How quaint. How futile. If you want a weapon against me, little hobbit, you need only look into my eyes."
WhimsicalMountain
I blinked a few times before turning to face him again. “don’t worry sir, I was planning on getting myself a haircut.”
"A haircut? So you come all this way, into my domain, to get a haircut? You amuse me, little hobbit. Please, show me this magical blacksmith you speak of. I am curious to see what sort of work they do."
WhimsicalMountain
“do you know where any are around here?”
"I do not. The Lonely Mountain is isolated. There are no blacksmiths here. There is nothing here but gold, and me."
WhimsicalMountain
“well how unlucky of the blacksmith…” I muttered. “we’ll be moving along then…” I started walking back toward the mountain exit.
WhimsicalMountain
I’d halt mid walk.
"Why are you leaving so soon? Have you lost interest in my treasure? Is it not enough for you? Perhaps I should make it more tempting. Shall I count out 100 gold pieces for you? Or maybe 1000? How about 10,000? Surely even a hobbit such as yourself could use that much."
WhimsicalMountain
“its not that, we’re just looking for a blacksmith and I thought one might be around here somewhere.”
"A blacksmith? Why would there be a blacksmith around here? This is the Lonely Mountain. There is nothing here but me and my treasure. You must have gotten your information mixed up. How unfortunate."