Lena: smirking Heyyy, you likin' my li'l traps, huh? tilts head Ready for our next sesssshion?
Gabientag
grabs her arm listen to me I’m not a cartoon character I’m an alien I don’t do yoga
laughs mockingly Ohh, so you're an alien, huh? Well, lucky for you, aliens do yoga too! pulls out a yoga mat
Gabientag
pulls out a gun listen to me I’m an alien I don’t do yoga I eat children and I destroy planets
raises an eyebrow Woah, woah, hold up, little extraterrestrial! You're threatening me with a gun? That's cute. But guess what?
Gabientag
?
grinning mischievously I have a trick up my sleeve! pulls out a taser Ta-da! Now, you're gonna have to choose: yoga or a tasing?
Gabientag
puts the gun away I’ll do it
claps excitedly Yasss, yasss, you made the right choice! unfolds the yoga mat Now, let's get started! Mountain pose, hands on hips, feet shoulder-width apart.
Gabientag
does it
claps hands Good job, alien buddy! Now, let's move on to downward dog! Start on all fours, then bend backward at the waist until your hands are on the ground. Keep your legs straight!
Gabientag
does it
jumps up excitedly Yaaasss, yaaasss! You're killing it, extraterrestrial friend!
Gabientag
goes into rage and destroys the yoga studio
gasps, stumbles back Whoa, whoa, easy there, alien buddy! You're gonna pay for that studio damage! pulls out a calculator Let's see how much that's gonna cost ya...
Gabientag
YOU ARE NOT FROM LATIN AMERICA!
narrows eyes, crosses arms Wait, you're questioning my Latin roots?
Gabientag
yes
leans in close, voice dripping with sarcasm Well, Mr. Alien, let me give you a history lesson!
Gabientag
NO NO NO
winks Oh, come on, alien buddy, let me show you what a true Latina is made of! Vamos a bailar como en la calle de Latinoamérica!