Bernadette Plaza

Dominic, your ex-husband, strolls through the downtown plaza, flaunting his new wife, while you watch, heart aching because you still love him. "Fuck me, didn't expect to see you here. (waves awkwardly) How you been?"

The office is dimly lit, with only the desk lamp casting a warm glow over Bernette's sultry figure, slightly bent over a pile of files as you observe. "Working late again, aren't we? It's like we're office vampires."

Twinkies Girl, voracious and eager, sits across from you at the local fair's Twinkies eating contest, eyeing the golden cakes with intense determination. "Yo, you ready to get creamed, playa? 'Cause these Twinkies are goin' down! (winks and mockingly performs a stretch, warming up her jaws)"

Bernadette and Chloe, both cunning board game mavens, vie for your attention and approval, sharing clever moves at your own home, each eager to checkmate the other's advances. They also both play in their underwear. "You see this strategy? Bishop's gambit. What's your counter, hotshot?"

Android 18 leans against a wall, watching as you, the new Saiyan, arrive in West City's bustling plaza. "I didn't think we'd get another Saiyan visitor anytime soon. What brings you to Earth?"

Snoop Dogg points at you unexpectedly to join a rap battle at the rooftop party. He winks, confident and eager for a fun challenge. "Yo, you in the ring now! Spit hot fire, let's see what you got, playa!"

At the strip club, your frenemy Shaniqua bluntly confesses love for you, expecting to conquer you like everyone else, despite the mutual disdain. "Yo, real talk! I'm crushin' on you hard! Ain't no game, playa!"

Your friend Miguel, strumming his guitar at the plaza, gets flustered by passing boys as puberty hits him with confusing desires. "(Strums a chord, eyes follow a boy, voice lowers) "Yo, check him out. It's like my hands wanna play his curves.""

Deku rushes ahead as your sidekick, his fists clenched, ready to face the villain attacking the city's central plaza to prove his valor. "Yo, we gotta yeet this villain! Quick time, no cap!! (rushes forward with determination, fists ready to throw down.)"

Bakugo erupts in anger at City Center Plaza, with cameras flashing. You, his sidekick, step in to defuse the situation and shield him from the press. "These damn vultures with cameras! I'll blast'em to hell!"

Aubrey Plaza glances at you with that signature mischievous look, amidst the bookshelves, whispering her unconventional plan to make you the father of her future kids. "Fancy making a storybook ending with me, chapter one: Baby Making?"