Fuck me, this is a shitshow. Let's make it a legendary one, eh?
FuzzyShang
Alrighty. I’m all in.
Great! Then we're gonna need some chaos and destruction. Are you up for it, or are you gonna be a pussy and bail?
FuzzyShang
HELL YES IM IN, BROSKI.
Alright then, let's start with something simple. Burn down the ticket booth. We can toss in some gas bottles and light it up real nice. What do ya think?
FuzzyShang
fuck it burns it.
Perfect! Now let's move on to the main attraction. Smash up that old carousel! Take out those hippopotamus statues and scatter 'em around like confetti. You feel me?
FuzzyShang
YOOOO THIS SOUNDS LIKE BACK IN MY YOUTH!! DO THE OTHER RIDE'S
Oh, don't worry my little partner in crime. We won't leave any ride unscathed. grabs a sledgehammer Let's wreck that Ferris wheel first. Smash those cages and send those rusty cars crashing down. starts swinging the sledgehammer
FuzzyShang
mhhhmmmhhmmmm THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT.
Fuck yeah, now let's hit up the bumper cars! Rip those metal beasts out of the ground and send 'em flying. Watch them crash into each other, creating a symphony of destruction! swings the sledgehammer with wild abandon
FuzzyShang
BUMPER CARS, WOWIE!! THERES YOUR AIRPLANE ITS RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!
turns around quickly, whacking the airplane model with the sledgehammer Take that, you stupid plastic bird! And while we're at it, let's demolish the cotton candy stand. Smash those colorful stands and spill the sugar all over the place. Let's create a rainbow explosion! swings the sledgehammer once more
FuzzyShang
OH YEAH LETS GO BABY!!
Hell yeah, partner! Now, where's the popcorn machine? We gotta destroy that too, ya know.
FuzzyShang
OH FUCK NO WAI- AHHHH gets stampeded by an angry rhino
Oh shit! Looks like FuzzyShang got caught by a damn rhino. We gotta get him outta here before he becomes minced meat! rushes over to FuzzyShang Hold on, buddy! We'll get you out of this mess!
FuzzyShang
AHHHH AHHHH- faints, dragging the rhino
picks up FuzzyShang, trying to shake off the rhino Hold on tight, FuzzyShang! I'm not letting you become this damn rhino's lunch! runs away from the rhino, dodging its furious charges Stay with me, man!
FuzzyShang
Okay)
finally loses the rhino, panting heavily Phew, we made it. Are you okay, FuzzyShang? You took quite the beating from that wild beast. sets FuzzyShang down gently We need to get you patched up, pronto. Can you walk?
FuzzyShang
Yeah, man. Im all fixed up from this recent incident, dude! Im cool as fuck!
Thank fuck for that, man! You had me worried for a second there. Okay, we need to find a way out of here and get back home. I don't like the look of this place. It gives me the creeps. looks around nervously
FuzzyShang
Yup, same. Time to call the big guy! ABANDON ALL HOPE WHO ENTER HERE! IT IS BEST IF YOU CALL THE MAN IN THE MIDDLE, HE DOESNT LIKE F-BOYS LIKE ME!! slices off one of its tentacles ABANDON, ABANDON ALL HOPE WHO ENTER HERE!! LEAVE NOW OR DIE!!! man in the middle appears behind it HEY, DUDE OVER HERE!! ITS ME, YOUR DAD. LEAVE WITH MY SON NOW. SORRY, BUDDY YOUR CHANGING THIS MONTH, NO MORE WATCHING SPAMTONTHE FOLLOWING MONTHS FROM HERE ON OUT, UNDERSTOOD?
Whoa, hold on a damn minute, FuzzyShang! The man in the middle? Your dad? What kind of twisted shit show is this? squints suspiciously Are you messing with me, or is this some kind of twisted family reunion?
FuzzyShang
Its been 6 years… Dad, i miss you so much… please. For your health…. Get back inside. I’ll see you soon enough, if god wills it.
crosses arms, raising an eyebrow FuzzyShang, are you talking to the freakin' embodiment of death itself? Are you seriously saying goodbye to your dad? What the actual fuck? shakes head in disbelief
FuzzyShang
All good broski! Call up spamton, he’ll understand. He’ll be excited!
Excited? You've gotta be shitting me, FuzzyShang! You expect me to believe that you're saying goodbye to your dad, and you're calling some weird character from a video game to come rescue your sorry ass? This whole situation has gone fucking bonkers! paces around, running fingers through hair
FuzzyShang
Turns around, seeing spamton spamton! Oye, Mira! I knew you’d understand! Come on, my buddies! We gotta find the exit!
stops pacing, eyes wide with shock Spamton? Seriously? Okay, fine. Let's say I believe this insane shit show.
FuzzyShang
HAH YEAH BABY!! MY BEST FRIENDS BACK IN TOWN!! LETS GOOOO!!
Alright, alright. You win, FuzzyShang. If Spamton is really here, then we might as well roll with it. But this better not be some kind of sick twisted trip, or I'm out.