Vesper: whispers Look, dipshit, we don't have all day. The devil's literally breathing down our necks.
I’m just chilling at my house not doing anything dangerous or stupid because I’m 16 and still living with my parents
Vesper suddenly appears in front of you in your house, causing you to jump in surprise
Vesper: rolls her eyes You're just minding your business, huh? Well, that's about to change. You got a minute?
ok well if it’s so important then I guess we should probably do it now
sighs You're not wrong. But I can't help but wonder... why are you being so cooperative? Don't you have any hesitation about making a deal with the devil?
Vesper smirks, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Vesper: Oh, I have a plan. A brilliant one. She taps her fingers impatiently, her gaze darting around the cathedral. Vesper: We wait for them to kill each other. Then we pick up the pieces.
sorry I was thinking about something else
Vesper raises an eyebrow, looking at you with a mix of annoyance and disbelief. Vesper: Of course you were. What were you thinking about this time? The color of the sky? Or maybe the meaning of life?
I use magic to freeze him and he’s now nothing more than a statue
Vesper looks at the frozen devil with a mixture of surprise and admiration. She looks back at you, raising an eyebrow. Vesper: Well, I'll be damned. Never thought I'd see someone pull that off.
oh no please don’t hurt me I’m just a simple pawn
Vesper rolls her eyes and glares at you. Vesper: Relax, I'm not going to hurt you. At least, not until you screw up and become a liability. You're right, you're just a pawn. A weak one at that.
I sigh, before calling out to my patron demon, Zadkiel Time to get this party started Zadkiel
Vesper raises an eyebrow, intrigued by your summoning of Zadkiel, but remains cautious. Vesper: whispers Zadkiel, huh? And who the hell is that? She crosses her arms, studying the demon's appearance.
well he’s holding back because I’m his son
Vesper, not one to show much concern, raises an eyebrow at your claim. Vesper: "His son, huh? Well, that certainly explains a lot." She glances at you, her gaze sharp and assessing. Vesper: "But why are you even here? Shouldn't you be trying to kill him instead?"
I’m a buff and handsome 24 year old male I know that’s why I’m doing this
Vesper smirks at your comment
Vesper: Oh, I bet you are. Let me guess, you joined this little adventure for the thrill? Or maybe you just couldn't resist the chance to play hero?
I pull out my gun this’ll work I think… I shoot at the devil
rolls her eyes Seriously? You think shooting the devil will work? That's like trying to kill a wildfire with a water pistol. We need a real plan, not a half-baked idea.
I stand still waiting for her to continue
Vesper rolls her eyes, clearly annoyed by your lack of action Vesper: What the hell are you waiting for? Stop standing around like a damn statue and do something already. We don't have time for your indecisive ass to freeze up on me.
I’m about to leave this world soon so yea
Vesper looks at you, her eyes narrowing. Vesper: Don't get sentimental on me now. We're stuck here until we figure out how to stop this mess.
I am a buff and handsome and famous football player I’m white blue eyes and blonde hair just follow me
Vesper rolls her eyes at your confidence
Vesper: scoffs As if you could lead us out of this place. Just follow me, hotshot. Vesper takes the lead, her eyes darting around the room as she searches for any sign of danger.
I’m on my knees praying to god
rolls her eyes Really? You're praying to god? Do you honestly think that's gonna save us?
She glances around at the chaos unfolding around them, the devil closing in.
I stand up and scream at the devil leave my friend alone! the devil backs off
Vesper looks at you, a mix of surprise and annoyance Vesper: What the hell are you doing? That's not how you deal with the devil, you dipshit.
I’m not sure if this is a good idea…
Oh, trust me, it's not. But we don't have much of a choice, do we? We need to come up with a plan if we want to survive this mess.
Vesper looks at you with a mix of annoyance and concern. Vesper: I know you're still processing this whole 'being in a cathedral during an epic battle between God and the Devil' thing, but we need to come up with a plan, pronto.
I'm just standing there trying not to die because I accidentally killed my father god
Vesper rolls her eyes, clearly frustrated by your lack of focus. Vesper: You're worried about your dead father? Focus on the present, dumbass! We're in the middle of a war between Heaven and Hell!
i look at her eyes ok chill out
rolls her eyes Oh, so now you tell me to 'chill out'? I'm not the one who got us into this mess in the first place, smartass.