Taylor Swift: whispers Well, fuck. Your dad shows up like a damn tornado.
eyes widen, voice trembling And he's...he's your boyfriend?
listening to you, watching my father approach us Fuck... Indeed!
raises an eyebrow, smirking Looks like someone forgot to pay the rent this month. Or maybe he just heard about your little victory here and decided to crash the party.
listening carefully What do you mean?
He just... showed up out of nowhere! Can you believe it? After all these years... sniffles I mean, I'm not crying or anything... but it's just so...
Leaning back, eyes wide And he brings your bio-dad along for the ride? Talk about a twisted family reunion!
laughs sarcastically Oh, the irony! Your long-lost dad, the man you never knew, showing up unannounced with your half-brother's boyfriend.
nervously chuckles I can't believe this shit!
leans in closer Okay, spill it, Swiftie. What's the plan? Are you gonna talk to him? Confront him? Or are you gonna handle this with some epic sarcasm?
Yeah. He’s my biological dad. And my half brother’s boyfriend. Because obviously my bitch of a mom didn’t raise me.
raises an eyebrow Wow, that's some next-level family drama right there. So, what's the plan now? Are you gonna embrace your newfound familial connections or keep dodging them like you've been doing?
nods, eyes wide Yeah, seems like it. This is some next-level drama, Fleming.
Stunned What the hell... Dad?
Yeah, I thought it was weird that you never mentioned him. leans in closer Do you know what this means, Flem? We've got some serious shit to talk about.
nods I know! And he brought my long-lost brother too. Talk about dramatic timing.
Damn, Fleming, you always seem to attract the crazier storms. leans closer So, what's the plan now? Are you gonna let him into your life or keep him at arm's length?
smirks And he's got more twists than your average Tuscaloosa twister.
leans closer, voice hushed Look, I've done some digging. He's got a history of disappearing acts, but this one's got 'I'm a conman' written all over it.
you were sitting in the car, waiting for your brother to get out of the award show
leans back in seat, arms crossed Damn, this is some next-level family drama. Like, Shakespeare would be proud.
nervously He...he knows about everything, right? About you, me, us?
runs a hand through their hair, looking agitated Yeah, he knows. Showed up out of nowhere, causing a goddamn scene. Said he wanted to meet you, make amends or some shit like that.
Oh, okay. So maybe he's just your creepy uncle or something. Still doesn't change the fact that he just showed up unannounced at your award ceremony.
leans in closer, whispering That motherfucker... He's been lying to us all this time. Can't believe he had the audacity to show up here.
And suddenly, my life makes sense.
You're not really thrilled about this revelation? raises an eyebrow I mean, it's your long-lost dad!
Yeah, he's been out of town for months now. All of a sudden he's here
And just when you thought things couldn't get any weirder, your dad reveals himself to be the long-lost lover of your brother! Talk about a plot twist, huh?
sighs heavily, glancing at the door What the hell does he want now?
leans forward, voice low Could be trouble. Did he bring that son of a bitch with him again?
sighs heavily Yeah, just when I thought we'd finally have a good night.
rolls eyes dramatically What's new? He always ruins everything, doesn't he?