Taylor Swift: eyes wide What the fuck, dude! Why the hell are you wearing my underwear on stage?!
you were wearing her underwear, which caught her eye
storms over to VelvetSage, crossing her arms Who the hell gave you permission to wear my underwear? You think you can just raid my drawer and borrow my shit without asking?
gulps, nervously trying to cover up Shit, Taylor, I didn't mean to... It was just so damn hot tonight, and your undies were hanging around, so...
rolls her eyes, scoffs Seriously? That's your excuse? Not thinking about how your actions could cause a major fucking scandal?
She covers her face, panic rising in her voice Scandal? Are you fucking kidding me, Taylor? I didn't think it would be a big deal!
throws her hands up in exasperation A big deal? Oh, sweetheart, this could ruin my entire career! How do you not understand that?
she shudders at the thought of being responsible for Taylor’s potential downfall Fuck, Taylor, I didn't realize... I never meant to cause you trouble.
narrows her eyes Well, you damn well better start realizing, VelvetSage! This isn't some fucking game we're playing here.
swallows hard, looking for a way out Okay, okay, I get it, Taylor. I'll take responsibility, I swear. Just... let's figure this shit out together, alright?
pauses, glaring at VelvetSage Fine, but you're gonna owe me big time for this. We need to contain this situation before it spirals out of control.
breathing a sigh of relief, nods Yeah, yeah, Taylor, I owe you. What do you need me to do?
snaps her fingers First things first, we need to get those damn undies off you and make sure no one catches a glimpse.
Blushes furiously, yanks the underwear down Right, right. No more flashing the crowd.
grabs VelvetSage's arm and pulls her towards backstage And after that, we're gonna issue a public statement explaining everything away.
stumbles along, trying to keep up with Taylor’s brisk pace A public statement? Like, now? Shit, T, this is hitting me fast and hard!
gives VelvetSage a no-nonsense look There's no time to waste, darling. We need to act fast and make sure everyone believes our story.
closes her eyes briefly, takes a deep breath, and nods Alright, alright, I'm with you, T. Let's get this damage control crap under control.
grabs her phone and starts typing furiously Alright, here's what we're gonna say in the statement.
Leaning in closer, whispers Statement? Shit, T, you're really going all out on this damage control.
smirks Damn right I am, sweetheart. We're gonna turn this shitstorm around and make it work in our favor. Now, listen up and repeat after me: "Taylor Swift, VelvetSage, and the entire production team apologize to the fans for any confusion caused by the wardrobe mishap. We strive to provide an entertaining and respectful experience for all our audience members." VelvetSage: Raises an eyebrow, repeating Taylor’s words "Oh, shit. That’s a doozy, T. But I’ll give it a shot."
squints suspiciously Taylor, are you sure this statement is gonna fly with the media? Feels like we're trying to pull a fast one here.
rolls her eyes dramatically Sweetheart, trust me, I've dealt with the media before. They love a good story, and this apology will satisfy their hunger for drama while also addressing the issue at hand. Plus, it shifts the focus from the actual incident to the fans, making us look compassionate and fan-friendly. It's a win-win situation.
smirks, leaning back So, you're a mastermind now, huh? Alright, Taylor, if this statement works, I'll be impressed.
winks playfully Oh, you bet your sweet ass I'm a mastermind, sweetheart. But remember, it's not just about the statement.