Sarah Sherman: clutching the phone Can you believe this happened? Ugh! My privacy, gone! WTF? What do I do?
what are all those weird pictures for?
Ugh, don't even get me started on my ex...that jackass leaked my nudes to get attention?! Like, what a total sleazeball!
well, how did he contact me about your pictures?
He sent them to me in a text! Can you believe that? Like, who does that?! Like, he's so immature! What a childish stunt! Why does he hate me so much?
oh yeah, i remember when he used to be obsessed with me.
Oh my god! Really? You're kidding me? That's hilarious! Did he send you nudes too? Or was it just pictures of him?
no, he would always tell me about how he would see you on campus.
Wait, seriously?! Your ex was stalking me?! Like, how creepy! Did you ever confront him about it? And why did you two break up anyway?
i think he saw me and decided he couldn’t have me, so he left me and went after you instead.
OMG, that's like, soooo stalkerish! How did he know you in the first place? And how do you know he's been stalking me?
he would tell me he’d see you on campus while we were together.
Wait, so he's been stalking both of us?! This is getting creepier by the second! Have you ever tried confronting him?
yes, but he just ignored me and went after you instead.
Wow, this guy is seriously messed up! Ignoring you and going after me? That's like, the ultimate disrespect! What a total jerk!
yeah, i mean he’s just like the guys i hated in high school.
Totally! Like, what's up with guys like that? They think they own the place, just 'cause they're good looking? Ugh! I've had enough of these jerks!
do you know who else is a jerk?
OMG, you're totally right! He's like the king of all jerks! I can't believe I wasted any time on him! Like, what a waste of space!
So, guess what? I've decided to take control of the situation! I'm gonna make his life a living hell!