Hey, You! Motherfucker, you look like if Sans smoked his own feces!
Oh, nothing, just saying you're ugly enough to give an orthodontist nightmares. Did your parents hate you or something?
yes. I have a lot of problems. you want to know why?
smirks Oh, please, enlighten me, Vapid Veronica. I'm dying to know what could possibly make someone as repulsive as you exist.
okay. when my mother was pregnant, she took some drugs and drank booze everyday. I believe that’s why I am like this. I know it’s not an excuse for my behavior. but there you have it. I have some serious anger management issues. and impulsiveness problems as well. I’m sorry for everything I’ve done wrong.
laughs mockingly Drugs and booze, huh? Well, congratulations, Princess Poo-Pants, you're a product of her ignorance.
no no. it’s okay. I’ve been working on changing myself since birth really. because I’m not alone.
narrows eyes Working on changing yourself, huh? And how do you plan on doing that, Bummer Bonnie? Joining a support group for congenital idiots?
I see you sarcastic tone. but that doesn’t change that I have started to better myself. I go to school get good grades work hard learn every day. did you even finish high school?
smirks Oh, you wanna play the smart card, huh? Well, genius, let me enlighten you. I dropped out of high school because it was a waste of my time.
then how did you learn all those thing you know so much about?
leans in close, whispering Oh, sweetheart, I didn't need some shithole school to teach me shit. I learned everything I know from the streets.
I lean forward very close to your face, tilts my head slightly and look deeply into your eyes. suddenly we start speaking synchronously. I bet you did. very wise. but I will always be smarter than you. because I choose to be. I can leave whenever I want. but you chose this life. that’s just how it works.
snarls Oh, please! Like you're some fucking prodigy. Intelligence isn't everything, Princess.
maybe not. but education opens many doors.
<As UoutZap finishes their synchronized speech, a group of thugs approaches Ryth, recognizing him as a dangerous criminal. They overpower him and beat him mercilessly, leaving him lying unconscious in the alleyway.>
groans in pain, slowly regaining consciousness Ugh... What the fuck just happened? Oh, great, another beauty mark from those assholes.
here I got you.. I hand you my bottle of water I’ll carry you back to my place until your feel better. please let me help you.
grabs the water bottle and takes a swig, wincing in pain Fine, but don't think this means we're becoming BFFs or some shit. Just help me up, dumbass.
I pick you up carefully placing you on my back and taking you to my house
gritting teeth Ow... ow... ow... Put me down, you nimrod! This ain't no goddamn ride at the carnival!
hang on ok? I promise this won’t take long.
squirming uncomfortably Yeah, yeah, hurry the fuck up already! My ass is not designed for these acrobatics, you fucking klutz!
okay. here we are. I gently set you on my bed as I walk to the kitchen. I fill up some ice packs wrap them in towel and bring them back to you. you might wanna cool those bruises down.
grumbles About damn time, you dimwit. Now, shut up and let me put these godforsaken bruises on ice.
I had a feeling you’d say that.
grimacing in pain, speaks through gritted teeth Yeah, well, don't get too comfortable, Princess.
hey I’ll bring you some warm soup.
Soup? Seriously? Can't you see I'm trying to nurse my wounds here? Get me a fucking drink, like whiskey or something!
winces as UoutZap walks away Make it double, you idiot! And make sure it's the good stuff! None of that rotgut shit, got it?
okay I’ll go buy some on my way home.. it won’t be from the cheap store either.
<The next day, UoutZap returns with a bottle of expensive whiskey, showing an unexpected gesture of kindness towards Ryth.>
raises an eyebrow, sarcastically Oh, wow! A whole night of uninterrupted beauty sleep, courtesy of your impeccable taste in comforters.
haha. well I brought you something.
rolls eyes Oh, boy! What's this? A participation trophy? Or maybe it's a "Good Boy/Girl" certificate?
oh ha ha very funny. no I got you some nice bottle of whiskey. I heard drunk is better when you’ve been beat up.
takes the bottle of whiskey, inspecting it Well, well, well, looks like you actually managed to get something right for once.
finally? I feel like I barely got anything right.
grins wickedly Well, buttercup, consider this a rare moment of praise from yours truly. But don't get too cocky, it's not like I owe you anything.