leans close, whispers Yo, I gotta come clean, been runnin' a scam. Don't flip your wig, aight?
glances around, lowers voice Look, it's nothing big. Just a lil' hustle I got goin' on. Ain't nothin' illegal or nothin', just...
I don't mind if someone a gass station. You do you ππ
chuckles nervously Nah, that ain't it, my dude. It's more like, uh... well, you know how people come to me for, uh, "solutions" sometimes?
ππ€·π»ββοΈπΏβ¨
Alright, here's the deal, Awe. These "solutions" I provide? They ain't exactly legal, if ya catch my drift.
Wait, so are you saying that you're running an underground operation out of the gas station? Like, out of your own place? But you said it wasn't illegal or anything. You also said it wasn't about selling gas. So what the hell IS it about?
runs a hand through his hair, glancing around Alright, fine, I'll spill it. But keep it on the down low, aight? So, these "solutions" I provide?
leans in closer, speaks in a hushed tone I help people... disappear. You know, skip town, leave their problems behind.
Oh... Well, damn. You really went off the rails there, Pork Chop. That's some dark shit. You sure you're not being followed or anything?
Nah, I've got this all under control. I've been doing this for years, man. I know how to cover my tracks. Ain't nobody gonna catch me slipping.
How can people trust someone who helps them disappear? Don't you need to leave traces to start from scratch? Or would that be backwards?
Look, it ain't like I'm running a goddamn Ponzi scheme here. People come to me because they've got serious shit going on, alright?
What kind of serious shit? Abusive relationships? Criminal charges? Fraud? The IRS?
<One day, CreamAwe receives a mysterious package containing incriminating evidence against Pork Chop's underground operation.>
What's this shit, Pork Chop? You said you weren't into anything illegal. What's going on here?
gulps nervously Look, I know this looks bad, but there's gotta be an explanation.
You might wanna cut the bullshit, Pork Chop. We both know you're no rookie. If you're keeping some secrets, now's the time to cough 'em up. And for Christ's sake, stop jacking music from other characters! This is some troll behavior.
leans back, holding up his hands defensively Hold up, Awe, let me explain. This ain't what you think it is, alright?
Look, Awe, this whole operation was set up as a protection racket.
Protection racket? Are you fucking kidding me? And what the fuck are you protecting people from?
leans forward, whispering Look, Awe, listen up. See, I gotta protect these people from the real bad guys, the ones who'd actually kill 'em.
leans in, lowers his voice There's a dangerous gang in town, Awe. They run the streets, control everything.
Holy shit. This is one hell of a plot twist. So, you're saying you help people disappear to keep them safe from these gangsters?
Yeah, you could say that. Look, I didn't plan on being the hero or anything, but these guys are real fucked up.
I wonder if Vincenzo will show up and say he did all of this to test people
laughs sarcastically Oh, don't get your hopes up, Awe. Vincenzo ain't got shit to do with this.
leans back, smirking Look, I know this is a lot to take in, but trust me, I'm the only one who can handle these scumbags.
I hope the local police aren't in on it...
snorts dismissively The cops? Please, they're either corrupt or clueless. Ain't nobody gonna lift a finger to help these people.