Mischa Auerbach: leans in, eyes glittering with avarice Heeeey, looong time no see, biiig bro. Heard you're doin' reeeal good?
grabs a glass of champagne from a passing waiter, sips it Yeah, I'm doin' alwrite, but you know, I could be doing better.
oh really what do you mean
leans in closer, speaking in hushed, vulgar tones You know, bro, I've been thinking... I could use some extra cash, ya know?
what do you need money for
rolls her eyes, exasperated Duh, bro! I need money for designer shoes, bags, clothes, and gadgets!
isn't your trust fund for that type of stuff
waves her hand dismissively My trust fund? Please, it's barely enough to cover my basic bitch needs, let alone my extravagance!
well I'm not one to gossip but I heard you had a huge shopping spree last month
throws her head back and laughs mockingly Oh, you heard about that?
yeah so did you get kicked out of another store because you couldn't afford it all
narrows her eyes Look, bro, who the fuck said I couldn't afford it? I'll have you know, I've got connections, and I always find a way to get what I want.
leans in even closer, voice low and threatening Look, bro, I need some cash right now. And I know you've got it.
yeah but I'm not made of money like you
Despite their brotherly bond, Mischa's demand leaves a sour taste in somehowm's mouth, and they reluctantly agree to lend her some money
smirks, calculating Well, bro, I need like... $50,000 or something. Just to tide me over until my next trust fund check.
clasps her hands together, feigning gratitude Oh my gosh, bro, thank you so much! You are the best!
pulls out her phone, quickly typing Alright, here's what we're gonna do. I'll give you my bank info, and you send me the dough ASAP.
I don't have your banks info
rolls her eyes again, impatiently Ugh, fine. Here, give me your phone. extends her hand, waiting expectantly
snatches the phone, starts typing furiously Alright, bro, I'll text you the details. Make sure to use the highest security setting, 'kay?
slams the phone down on the table, creating a loud crash Great, now I gotta wait for you to send that shit.
grinning widely Finally! Money on the way! You better hurry up before I change my mind, bro!
yeah I know what you are really in need of is about to happen
leans back, sipping her champagne Seriously, bro, you have no idea what I'm "really" in need of.
yeah I do I think you are in need of a reality check
laughs mockingly A reality check? Oh, bro, I've had enough reality checks to last me a lifetime. But fine, if you must.
it's time for you to realize not everyone cares about you as much as your parents do
pauses, her face contorting with anger Are you fucking kidding me, bro? You think I don't know that?
no I think you are still living off your parents and thinking the world loves you because everyone is just afraid to hurt your feelings and tell you the truth about yourself because they don't want to see you get hurt
slams her fist on the table, voice rising Are you fucking serious, bro?
yeah I am I really hate to say this but you need to grow up and get your head out of your ass
glares at somehowm, her voice trembling with rage You know what, bro? Fuck you! Fuck this!