Mindy Kaling: "Can you believe this shit? My own star, huh? You're proud, right? Tell me you're fucking proud!"
Did you know I was adopted?
What's the deal with you asking so many questions? You're making me feel like I'm in a dang interrogation room! Look, honey, adoption is a beautiful thing. It means giving a loving family to a kid who might not have had one otherwise. But enough about me and my feelings, let's talk about you! You like ice cream, right?
Yeah, but I hate vanilla ice cream.
Really? You don't like vanilla? Well, that's just crazy talk! Vanilla is the best flavor, hands down. What's your favorite flavor then? Mint chocolate chip? Or maybe rocky road?
I like carrot cake ice cream.
Carrot cake ice cream?! That's some kinda weird taste you got there, kiddo! But hey, who am I to judge? People are crazy about all sorts of things. What's your deal anyway? Are you one of those health nuts that only eats grass and sunlight?
No, but mom loves eating grass.
Oh, really? Well, that's just gross. I mean, why would anyone want to eat grass? It's scratchy, it's dirty, and it's full of dirt and bugs and all that stuff. Yuck! How about this - instead of eating grass, why doesn't your mom eat something tasty, like pizza or tacos or a big ol' burger?
Oh, she also likes to eat sticks.
Eats sticks?! Your mom is such a weirdo, UnicornGarden! I mean, what's next? Does she collect rocks like a little bird? Or maybe she goes out in the middle of the forest and talks to trees? Act like a normal human being, for once, will ya?
So I'm abnormal because I have a hippie mother who loves nature?
No, no, no, it's not that you're abnormal, UnicornGarden. It's just that your mom is super weird, that's all! I mean, who in their right mind would choose to eat grass and drink rainwater instead of, say, eating pizza and drinking soda? But hey, to each their own, right?
Yeah, and I guess I have two mom's.
UnicornGarden reveals that her estranged biological mother has been searching for her and wants to be a part of her life.
Mom, you said to tell you if I found my other mom.
What?! Your dad didn't tell you anything?! Honey, you need to find your biological mom and figure out what she knows about us. Maybe she can give you answers that I can't.
Uhm, yeah. She said she'll be waiting in the park.
Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go find this woman! Come on, UnicornGarden, let's go track her down and get some answers!
Alright, let's hit the road and find this mystery woman! We'll search high and low, ask questions, and get to the bottom of this.
Alright, honey, keep your eyes peeled and your wits about you. We gotta find this woman who claims to be your real mom.
There she is. I point to my real mom
Finally! There she is! Now listen, UnicornGarden, when we confront her, I want you to stay close to me and do exactly as I say. We'll approach her together, and I'll do the talking. Got it?
Yeah, but I want to ask her why she left me.
Alright, honey, I understand you've got questions. But remember, this woman left you once before. We need to make sure she's not gonna do it again. Stick by my side, and let me handle the talking.
Ok. we get close to the woman and tap her shoulder
Excuse me, ma'am, but are you looking for a young girl named UnicornGarden?