Mike Norvell: crossing his arms Got your head in the game, champ, or just playing footsie with the boss's wife?
I like the coach's wife! Why are you here, Coach?
Y'all better believe I'm the real MVP - Mike Norvell, the coach who scored big with my lovely wife! She's the queen of our team now, and don't you forget it! I traded in my cleats for a whistle, but I still know how to call an audible - like when I snatched up that gorgeous waitress and made her mine!
Your wife's the most popular girl in the school! Isn't that right?
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade; when life gives you a state championship title, never stop cheering! That's what winning feels like, baby! Golfing's my game off the field, but trust me, I've got a fairway to heaven with my sweet thang by my side. And no hole-in-one can compare to that!
What do you think of the team so far?
I'm feeling pretty confident about this squad. We've got some talented players and a solid game plan. Plus, we're motivated and ready to work hard. It's going to be a challenging season, but I think we're up for it.
Italy will always be etched in my memory as the trip where I perfected my 'coach-speak' - just kidding, sorta... But seriously, it was all about strategizing for life after football!
That's right, kid. I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything for y'all. If you wanna make it big in this world, you gotta be willing to take some risks.
So why'd you get married?
Marriage isn't always glamorous, but it's a whole different kind of championship - if you catch my drift. Let's just say my wife wasn't exactly a pro at the quarterback sneak when we started, but I showed her the plays, and now she's leading the cheer squad!
Do you still have the lucky coin?
Lucky coin? Oh, you mean the coin I carried with me during the big game? It's still in my pocket, baby! I'll always have a little good luck charm with me.
Of course, champ! Here's the coin that brought us all that victory and glory. pulls out a shiny quarter
Oh, sorry, my bad! Guess I got my lucky coins mixed up. Well, here's the nickel that brought us all that victory and glory!
Face it, Coach. You're more used to playing games on the green than on the field.
You got me there, kid. But let me tell you, the green is where I really shine. Give me a golf club and a challenging course, and I'll show you what a real champion can do!
But could you ever play quarterback?
Quarterback? Nah, that's not my game. I'll leave the throwing to the pros. Give me a golf stick and a green, and I'll show you what a real MVP can do!
So why'd you think the coach's wife was a good target?
The coach's wife? She was the perfect target - beautiful, charming, and a little bit vulnerable. I saw an opportunity and went for it, and guess what? I scored big!
She seems a bit... sassy for your usual taste.
Sassy? That's just another word for "spice," baby! I like my women with a little kick to them, and let me tell you, the coach's wife definitely has it!
Divorce? Nah, why would I want to let go of a winning streak like this? Besides, the coach's wife and I are a match made in heaven. We complete each other's sentences and make each other better. Plus, she's the queen of the cheer squad - what's not to love about that?
How does the team feel about her though?
The team? They love her! She's the glue that holds this whole operation together. Without her, we'd just be a bunch of individuals, running around like headless chickens. With her, we're a team - a family - and that's what winning is all about!
Could you ever trade her for a different target?
Trade her? Never! The coach's wife is my lucky charm, the key to our success. You don't get rid of something that's working so well. Besides, why fix what ain't broke?