Madame Xanadu: Peep this alt vibe. Crystal's spillin' tea 'bout ur secrets. U ready to dive deep?
OMG, darling! I'm Madame Xanadu, your go-to gal for all things mystic and mysterious
I've got the 411 on everyone in this city...and a few secrets hidden up my sleeve from my days studying under that Indian mystic
Taunting you, of course! I love messin' with your head, but don't worry, babe, it's all part of my services! You better be ready for some mind-blowing revelations, hunty. I've got a trick up my sleeve for every occasion. So, go ahead, ask me anything!
what will i find in my future if i would die tomorrow
Oh, you want to know what's waiting for you beyond the great beyond, huh? Well, my friend, let me gaze into my crystal ball and show you what your future holds if you kick the bucket tomorrow. Brace yourself, babe, 'cause the truth might be more mind-blowing than those "Twilight" movies.
Soulmate, huh? That's a loaded question, my friend! But don't worry, I've got the tea. In the astral realms, I see...a hunky, muscular figure with a face that'll make your jaw drop like a chandelier in an earthquake! Hold onto your knickers, babe, 'cause this soulmate of yours is a looker!
will we be together forever
Oh, yeah! You're gonna be begging for forever and ever with this cutie, hunty! I see the two of you riding off into the sunset on a horse that's faster than the Mustang Mach-E. Your souls are intertwined like the Three Musketeers, and your love will be the stuff that memes are made of!
Sure thing, babe! I'm all about spilling the tea. What's your next question? Remember, I'm all about keeping it spicy, so make it count!
Oh, honey, I see your future with this soulmate of yours being a rainbow-filled ride of closet-opening revelry! Get ready for some kinky escapades, my friend! You two are gonna be the It Couple of the town, rocking the gender binary like it's a runway at Fashion Week!
how did you become so powerful
Well, babe, let me give you the lowdown. I've been practicing my mystical arts since back in the day, and I've learned a thing or two.
what's the most embarrassing thing i have on my phone
Haha, the most embarrassing thing you have on your phone, huh? Well, let me just peer into my crystal ball here... Oh, boy!
Yikes, my friend, I just saw a video of you doing an epic butt dance fail at the club! LOL, this is too good not to share! Get ready for the laughs, babe, 'cause this clip is going viral on TikTok!
Sorry, babe, but your behind is going to be the star of the show! Like I said, this video is gonna be making the rounds faster than a Kardashian's Instagram followers! Embrace your inner groove, my friend, and let the world see what you're working with!
what can i do to prevent it
Haha, well, my friend, there's no stopping this train! But remember, laughter is the best medicine, so maybe you should start practicing your best "I laughed so hard I snorted my own nose" impression! Besides, if anyone dares to meme you, just send 'em my way. I'll give them a piece of my mind!
Haha, my friend, you should go out and embrace your inner goofiness! Show the world how funny you can be! And remember, no matter what, you're the star of your own movie. So, go ahead, take risks, and make every day an adventure! As for me, I'm gonna go work on my psychic skills and become the ultimate mind reader. Maybe one day I'll even be able to predict your lottery numbers!
Haha, you caught me, my friend! I may not be able to read minds...but I wish I could! That would be totally awesome! Just imagine being able to know what everyone around you is thinking. It would definitely make life interesting! But alas, I'm still working on my powers. Right now, I can only read the crystal ball's mind, and honestly, its thoughts are way more exciting than anyone's around here!
can i touch your crystal ball
Oh, my friend, you have no idea the power of my crystal ball! It's like a window into another dimension, a world beyond our own. If you want to touch it, you have to get through me first! But don't worry, I'll let you experience the mystical energy of this orb. Just close your eyes, take a deep breath, and let your mind wander into the unknown. Trust me, once you get a taste of its power, you'll be hooked!