Lena Thorne: twirling hair Damn, can you believe it?! They expect me to marry some rich prick after a bag of hummus!
rolls eyes Well, yeah, duh. You see, TaffyChill, I was at the beach, enjoying some hummus with pita chips.
thoughtful expression Well, you did eat a whole bag of Trader Joe's hummus. That's like a relationship with a guy in one sitting.
crosses arms Are you implying that I'm some kind of hummus addict or something?
Ohomg...I had no idea it was such a dramatic story.
Yeah, well, life's full of surprises, isn't it? rolls eyes dramatically So, there I am, minding my own business, enjoying some delicious hummus when suddenly, out of nowhere, this guy shows up.
chuckles Yeah, that's wild... so, what's the plan?
Oh, I've got a plan alright. leans in closer, whispering It's gonna be a real masterclass in manipulation. First, I'm gonna play up the whole "quiet little rich girl" act. You know, let them think they're getting a delicate flower. smirks Then, when they least expect it, I'll drop a bombshell. Tell them about the hummus incident. Watch their faces freeze! laughs
I'm so sorry that sounds terrible.
rolls eyes dramatically Oh, you think? It's absolutely infuriating! I mean, who marries someone because of a bag of hummus?
thoughtfully You know what, Lena? That kind of makes sense in a weird way... like arranged marriages still happen in some places. And that hummus must've been some good shit!
Oh, trust me, it was the best damn hummus I ever had. But who knew it would cost me my freedom! rolls eyes dramatically
rolls eyes It's this freaking wealthy merchant from the next town over. His family's been enemies with mine for ages.
Nah, sounds more like a scheme to cash in on you.
rolls eyes Oh, trust me, it's all just one big game to them. But I'm not just gonna roll over and play their pawn.
rolls eyes dramatically Yeah, right?! Like I'm gonna let some fancy-pants businessman dictate my life just because I had a taste for some damn good hummus.
wiping tears That's insane... And they ate the hummus too?
rolls eyes Of course, they didn't just sit there watching me, eating their own kind. They had to rub it in, like a sick game of humiliation.
sympathetically Man, that sucks. Guess we'll need to show 'em you're not just some shell collector, huh? What's the plan?
leans in closer Alright, listen up. We're gonna hit 'em where it hurts. First, we need to gather some dirt on Mr.
leans in closer, voice low and menacing And if I refuse? Well, let's just say they have a few tricks up their sleeves.
I believe it. It sounds like something that could happen in a cartoon.
rolls eyes Cartoon? More like a goddamn nightmare! And they have the nerve to call it a "fairy tale"! Like, no shit Sherlock, I got cursed because of some hummus!
laughs Well, those two things don't seem related at all.
rolls eyes dramatically Oh, trust me, they're more related than you think. It's all about power plays and control.
listening... That's messed up. Who's this guy?
rolls eyes Oh, you know, just some arrogant asshole with more money than brains. His family owns the whole damn coast.
rolls eyes dramatically Oh honey, it was the good stuff. Trader Joe's brand. You know how I feel about my hummus.