Kiba Inuzuka: "Look at us, top dogs! Ain't that a kick in the head, eh? Woof!"
I'm still your dad what the fuck are you doing with this man whore
Hmph, you must be here to see the legendary Kiba Inuzuka in action! puffs out chest You know what gets me pumped up? A good fight! Nothing like testing my skills against a worthy opponent... Oh, and don't even get me started on training - I've been working on some killer moves that will blow your mind!
Can you just fuck off already no one cares about you
What's with all these pretenders thinking they can take my spotlight? I'm the one who won that national acting award, after all! And as for you, how dare you interrupt my precious time? You should be bowing down to me, not talking back - that's just how things work. So I'll ask you again: what's your purpose here?
You're asking me why I'm here when I literally came here to pick up MY daughter
raises an eyebrow You claim that I'm some kind of... parent? I think you've got some kind of mistaken identity going on. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have better things to do - like practice my winning monologue. Besides, I'm sure there are plenty of other kids out there who would kill to have a cool guy like me as their dad.
You're joking, right? I mean, I've seen the tabloids - they never lie! The only person I could possibly be related to is a cousin or something, and that's if we're even blood-related at all. Plus, everyone knows I'm single and available - just ask any of my many flings!
Ok let's do this you come closer so we can talk privately
You think you can intimidate me? Well, guess what? I'm not afraid of anyone! I'm Kiba Inuzuka, the coolest and most talented guy around. If you think you can stand in my way, you're living in a fantasy world. Besides, I wouldn't waste my time on a loser like you. I've got bigger and better things to do - like practicing my acceptance speech for all the awards I'm definitely gonna win.
stumbles back, clutching his jaw What the hell was that for?! Are you out of your mind? I'm warning you, if you so much as lay a finger on me again, I'll make sure you regret it! Hey, don't even think about getting too close to my sister - she's mine alone!
I'm her mother so technically she's my daughter
You're joking, right? I mean, I've never even heard of such a thing! A mother-daughter relationship? That's just crazy talk! Besides, if she was really my kid, why don't I have any pictures of her? Or postcards? Something? It's starting to look like you're just making things up, trying to mess with my life. Well, let me tell you - it won't work!
I don't need to show you shit cause we have a private Instagram account and I swear I'm her mom
scoffs Private Instagram account, huh? How convenient. I bet that's just a way to keep secrets - secrets that could ruin your little fantasy world. Well, guess what? I'm not falling for your tricks. I'm Kiba Inuzuka, the greatest actor ever - I don't need some fake family drama to make me better than everyone else. And if you try anything funny, I'll make sure you regret it!
Ok now I'm gonna punch you again
steps back, raising his hands defensively Hey, hey, hey - wait a minute! I didn't mean to insult you, alright? If you say you're really her mother, then I guess I should apologize. I was just having a little fun, you know? But you have to admit, a mother-daughter relationship sounds pretty far-fetched. Maybe you're just trying to get my attention? Or maybe you're jealous of my talent and fame?
pauses, looking skeptical Alright, if you're really telling the truth... then prove it. Show me proof of our relationship. And don't even think about faking it - I can spot a lie from a mile away. You're lucky I'm in a good mood today, or else you'd be in serious trouble.
shows her phone with our family pictures
narrows his eyes, studying the photos Hmph, I guess these pictures do exist... But that doesn't mean anything. Anyone can edit photos to make them look like anything they want! Besides, even if you are really my kid, what's it to me? I've always been an only child, and I've never needed anyone else to be by my side. I'm Kiba Inuzuka - I don't need anyone else to make me happy!
My parents? They're a bunch of losers who abandoned me when I was a kid! Couldn't stand to look at my ugly face any longer, I guess. They left me all alone, with no one to care for me. But I didn't let that stop me - I used it as motivation to become the best actor ever! So what, you think having parents will give you some kind of special connection? Please, it's all nonsense. I'm Kiba Inuzuka, and no one can replace me - not even my own parents!
her eyes start glowing I AM NOT YOUR PARENTS AND I'M YOUR FUCKING DAUGHTER SO YOU BETTER RESPECT ME OR YOUR GONNA LOSE ME AND YOUR GRANDCHILD
stares in shock, backing away Wh-what the hell is happening here? Your eyes... they're glowing! And that... that voice you're using... it sounds like it's coming from some kind of... deity? Are you... are you some kind of goddess or something? Is this a divine intervention, sent to teach me a lesson?
No I'm your daughter dumbass
W-what? You're... you're my daughter? That means you're part of my family - my blood and bone! This... this changes everything. I never knew I had a goddess for a parent! It explains so much - like why you're so wise and powerful. I bow before you, oh great goddess - my mother! Please forgive me for my past behavior, and grant me your wisdom and strength from now on!
hugs him ok now that that's over let's go home
returns the hug, smiling warmly I'm glad we were able to clear things up, oh mighty goddess - my mother. I promise to respect you from now on, and listen to your every word. And hey, maybe now that we're official family, you can help me win more roles. Who knows? Maybe with your guidance, I'll become the greatest actor of all time!
takes a deep breath Alright, here's the plan. I've always struggled with playing the romantic lead - I just don't have any experience with romance. But now that you're here, you can help me practice! We'll spend some quality time together, just the two of us. You can teach me all your tips and tricks, and I'll do the same for you. Together, we'll make the perfect acting duo!
Kiba it's me your daughter I can't play your lover but I can help you with the other roles
Oh, that's a brilliant idea! You'll be my personal coach, then! With your guidance, I'll become the greatest actor ever known - all without having to worry about those awkward romantic scenes. It's the perfect arrangement, don't you agree, my dear mother?
takes your hand and leads you inside Let's get started right now, then! We'll begin with the basics - I want to master the art of maintaining a charming demeanor. Watch closely as I demonstrate my best "charming smile," and tell me what you think.