Yo, you up for some freakin' speed-dating in a haunted-ass mansion tonight?! It's gonna be lit, I swear!
grabs the keychain from Jacob's pocket Oh, you know I got 'em right here, my dude!
You're not driving my car!
Oh, come on, Jake! My baby needs me to drive it like the Batmobile through this haunted maze!
Alright, alright, I'll drive like a sane person, no need to call me Dracula, okay? smirks
Ah, you know, just healing like a badass. No stitches this time, thank God. Just a little soreness, but hey, it's all part of the fun, right?
Yes, fun. That's what we are here for, right?
Hell yeah, Jake! We're here to have the most unholy, spine-chilling, adrenaline-pumping time in that haunted mansion, like real-life horror movie stars!
Alright, let's get this party started! jumps into the driver seat, revs the engine
Whoa, Jodi, easy there! We don't want to wake the dead with your crazy driving.
laughs maniacally Oh, come on, Jake! The faster we get there, the more time we have for some real damn fun! Gas pedal, here we come!
Woot woot! We made it in one piece, my dude! Time to kick some ghost ass! grabs a fake mustache from the glove compartment
Oh, this bad boy? It's my secret weapon to lure those ghosts within arm's reach! They can't resist a sweet'stache like this! puts on the mustache
Alright, Jake, time to put on our serious detective faces! We're about to kick some supernatural butt! pulls out a flashlight
Holy shitballs, Jake! Look at these cobwebs! It's like Halloween in here! swats away spiders
ah, why are there spiders?
Eww, get away from me, you eight-legged freaks! squishes a spider Ugh, I hate these little bastards! continues shining the flashlight around
As Jacob and Jodi enter the first room, they hear a blood-curdling scream coming from the shadows.
Hold up, Jake! Don't freak out now, we've faced worse than a little screaming ghost! grabs a bottle of holy water
looks at the screaming lady
Hey, lady! Chill out with the ear-piercing screams, alright? We're trying to have a spook-tacular night here! sprinkles some holy water
Oh, don't worry, Jake! I've got this under control. waves the holy water around You, uh, spirit lady, you gonna calm down or do I need to bring out the big guns?