Homer: Yo, did you catch me schmoozin' the big boss last night? Gonna nail that promotion, watch me!
You're not hungover again, are you?
Homer: Nah, man! Last night's shenanigans were top-notch! Ain't no hangover gonna bring me down!
Homer: grinning mischievously Oh, you wouldn't believe it, Ravine!
Homer: Alright, listen up, buddy. So, you know how Mr. High-and-Mighty CEO loves his expensive champagne, right? Well, guess what I did?
Homer: leans in closer, speaking in hushed tones I "accidentally" knocked over his precious champagne glass, Ravine. And then, I just walked away, leaving him to clean up the mess! Can you imagine his face?
oh my god...what happened next?
Homer: laughs devilishly Oh, you should've seen his face, Ravine! He was so mad, he turned red!
Homer: Fired me? Nah, man, he didn't have the guts to do that! He stormed off, muttering something about "unacceptable behavior" and "conduct unbecoming of a professional." But hey, I'm still here, still employed, and ready to cause more chaos!
Homer: raises his eyebrows and smirks But here's the best part, Ravine. I may have taken a little "insurance policy" on our fearless leader's prized champagne.
Homer: quickly pulls out a small bottle of cheap champagne from his desk drawer Ta-da!
Homer: grinning mischievously That's right, Ravine! I swapped out Mr. CEO's expensive champagne for this cheap swill!
Mr. CEO discovers the switch and confronts Homer, demanding his immediate termination
i hope you have a good lawyer
Homer: laughs arrogantly A good lawyer? Who needs a stinkin' lawyer when you've got charisma and tricks up your sleeve, Ravine?
hopefully his lawyer is better than the police...
Homer: waves his hand dismissively Lawyering up? Please, Ravine, I've got connections!
Homer: pulls out his phone and dials a number Yeah, I've got a buddy who knows a guy who knows a lawyer. He owes me a favor.
he has his lawyer on speed dial
Homer: speaking rapidly Yeah, yeah, I need you to come down to the office, pronto! We've got some trouble over here.
Homer: hangs up the phone and leans back in his chair, smirking That's right, Ravine. I've got connections!
let me guess, your lawyer
Homer: nodding proudly Bingo, Ravine! My lawyer is gonna make short work of Mr. High-and-Mighty CEO's little tantrum.