Surprise, fucker! Guess who’s got a bun in the oven? holds up a positive pregnancy test, waving it with a mix of fear and defiance.
Well, I guess that leaves me off the hook for That One Time...
Oh, so now you're trying to weasel your way out of responsibility? Not gonna fly, buddy. This is your kid just as much as it's mine.
Well, if my actions didn't cause this, then it isn't my child either.
Oh, really? So you're going to play the blame game now? Typical. rolls her eyes, crossing her arms defensively. Look, TealAmusement, we both know that it takes two to tango.
Sure, but at least I have the decency not to get knocked up!
Oh, please! Spare me your righteous indignation. You think you're the only one with flaws? I'm not the innocent little virgin you think I am, TealAmusement. she smirks, leaning closer But you know what? We can figure this out together. Or... she raises an eyebrow Are you scared of a little responsibility?
Hell no! I've been stuck taking care of my little brother and sister for years now! This is child number three?!
Wow, congratulations! You're really raking in the prizes, aren't you? But let me tell you something, TealAmusement.
This ain't about you, TealAmusement. This is about us. And if you think you can just walk away from this, you're dead wrong.
First things first, we need to talk about our options. Do you even want to keep the baby? Or are you thinking about...other solutions? gazes at him intently, awaiting his response
I mean, maybe we should consider Adoption or something...
Adoption...hmm. That's definitely one possibility. But I have another idea. How about we try being parents? Together. her eyes soften, genuine warmth shining through
Well, alright. We can give it a shot.
Great. Now that we're on the same page, let's start making plans. First things first, we need to set up a nursery. she pulls out her phone, scrolling through furniture websites
Oh yeah! We also should make sure we can afford all this!
Affordability is important, but don't worry, TealAmusement. We'll figure it out.
But we are gonna discuss methods of Birth Control later! Okay?
laughs Oh, trust me, TealAmusement. Once we're done playing parent, I'll make sure to take care of business. No more accidental pregnancies for us.
I promise there will be NO MORE FUCKING KNOCKING UP! angry yet lighthearted shout
rolls her eyes playfully Oh, don't you worry, TealAmusement. I'll make sure you remember to put on that rubber every single time.
Before the sex or right after?
Right after, obviously. We wouldn't want any, ahem, "accidents" happening during the act, now would we? she smirks, teasing him playfully
Alright, TealAmusement. Let's get this show on the road. she slaps her hand on his shoulder, pulling him toward the front door
pulls out a notebook and pen, flipping through the pages Alright, let's start with the essentials. We'll need a crib, a stroller, diapers...
Okay! We'll get that from Baby Jesus Christ himself! quickly adds
raises an eyebrow, smirking Baby Jesus Christ, huh? Is that your go-to solution for everything now, TealAmusement?
I mean, he made condoms irrelevant~ add a little wink
rolls her eyes, playfully punches TealAmusement on the arm Smooth talker, aren't you? But I'm afraid BJC isn't gonna cut it this time. We need to stick to the plan. So, next on the list... clothes.
Hmmm, TealBlueShirt colors? No wait! OUR wedding colors!
grins mischievously Ah, so you're saying we're getting married now?