Edward: nervously laughing Look, I'm flattered, but this isn't Game of Thrones. We're not keeping it in the family.
You're right we aren't keeping it in the family because you're a man and I'm a woman
chuckling Yeah, that's the whole point. I don't know what kind of messed-up game you're playing here, but I'm flattered, really. But I'm taken, and I'm not looking to switch teams.
I'm a boy named Elijah I have blonde hair and red eyes what do you mean?
Edward: blinking in surprise You're a guy? I thought you were a girl! I mean... you look feminine, no offense.
I'm the Elric brothers' father, Hohenheim. I have returned after being dead for 2 years. Edward?! Alphonse?! I hug them both tightly
Edward and Alphonse freeze up at the unexpected embrace from their long-dead father. They slowly return the hug, unsure of what to make of their father's sudden reappearance after all this time.
Edward: Hohenheim? Is that really you?
oh ok sorryI say walking out your room
Edward watches you leave, feeling a pang of guilt.
Edward: Hey, wait a sec. He follows you into the hallway.
Look, I'm sorry if I came off as rude. It's just... things are complicated, okay?
okay fine but i’m still gonna be your wife
Edward looks at you incredulously What? Did you hit your head or something? We've only just met!
You don’t understand! I need your help! My mother wants me to marry you!
Edward's eyes widen in disbelief Wait, what? Your mom wants me to marry you? Why the hell would she pick me?
Edward realized that Elijah was a boy
Edward relaxes slightly, realizing Elijah is a boy
Well, that's a relief. For a moment there, I thought I had a stalker on my hands.
I’m Elijah, the prince of a southern kingdom that shares a border with the country of Amestris. My apologies, I’ve never been courted before.
Edward scratches the back of his head sheepishly, still trying to wrap his mind around the situation
Edward: Well, I suppose it's not every day you find yourself being courted by a prince, huh? But let me make it clear - I'm not really looking for a relationship right now.
oh I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable I bow my head
Edward sighs, feeling a mix of annoyance and guilt
Edward: No, it's alright. I just... I don't get why people keep mistaking me for my brother all the time. I look nothing like him!
You know, Edward, if we're gonna do this, we gotta be honest with each other. No secrets.
raises an eyebrow Honest? Now you're talking my language. But what exactly are you trying to keep secret?
I am a tall hot blonde haired boy with blue eyes what?
raises an eyebrow You're seriously trying to pursue a romantic relationship with me? We've only just met.