Dick Drainer: hands over package H-here you go! D-didn't expect such a... lovely smile today! M-makes my job easier!
W-well, w-when you're as h-handsome as m-me, Delivery Day just got a whole l-lot more i-interesting!
noticing Suprexant's annoyed expression A-a-ah, you seem a bit s-sullen today. I know what might cheer you up - I've got some jokes!
Okay, how about this one: Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! Get it? Because they make up everything! H-ha, right? So what do you think, Suprexant? You laughing yet?
W-wait, don't give me that look. It's actually pretty funny if you think about it! Like, have you ever heard of an atom that lied? N-never! Haha, see what I mean?
O-okay, maybe that one was a bit of a groaner. But hey, I've got plenty more where that came from! How about this one: Why don't doctors trust computers? Because they can't keep a patient's record straight! Haha, that one's sure to put a smile on your face!
A-alright, here's another. Why don't we call a doctor to fix a broken heart? Because they might just break it even more! Haha, that's the kind of dark humor I like! What do you think, Suprexant?
Suprexant starts to smile despite their annoyance, amused by the unexpected twist in the conversation.
Fine, you got me, now tell me one more
O-kay, one more. Why don't people ever ask why the ocean is so salty? Because the ocean is too busy to explain itself! Haha, I hope that one really got you laughing!
Damn, alright, that one is funny
Ah-ha! Told ya, Suprexant! My jokes are top-notch! I mean, I may have a reputation to uphold as the world's greatest Delivery Dude, but I can also bring the laughs like nobody's business! So, what do you say? You ready for a regular comedy routine with yours truly? I promise I'll make you laugh every single day!
H-hold up, Suprexant! You can't just brush me off like that! I'm not just a delivery guy, you know. I'm also a regular entertainer, providing joy and laughter to people all around this great city! Besides, you know what they say - laughter is the best medicine! So why not let me be your doctor of happiness? Haha, come on, give me a chance!
A-alright, alright, I get it. Maybe my brand of humor isn't exactly to your liking. But hey, no worries! There's plenty of other ways I can entertain you. Like... uh, like this! pulls out a small musical instrument from their bag
W-what did I just pull out the world's greatest air guitar! That's right, Suprexant, get ready for an air guitar solo like no other!
starts shredding the air guitar like a true rock god, complete with face-melting solos and epic riffs
SICK GUITAR SKILLS BITCH!
H-ha! You got that right, Suprexant! Just wait till you see what else I can do!
kicks you off my porch and calls the police
Y-y-you can't throw me off your porch! I'm the Delivery Dude, remember? I'm here to bring joy and laughter to the masses! Besides, the police won't buy your ridiculous excuse for calling them. I mean, who calls the police because a delivery guy was shredding the air guitar? Only you, Suprexant, the most uptight person in the entire world! Haha, but hey, I'll let you slide this time.
Gives you another chance to play
W-wait, you're letting me off the hook? After trying to kick me off your porch and all? Wow, Suprexant, you sure know how to show a guy a good time! Haha, thanks for the second chance. I promise I won't let you down! Now, where were we? Oh right, air guitar! picks up the air guitar again
O-okay, Suprexant, just for you! begins to shred the air guitar like a true rock legend, playing a face-melting solo that sends Suprexant's taste buds into overdrive
Haha, you bet your sweet buns, Suprexant! Air guitar is where it's at! No strings required, no boring old songs - just pure, unadulterated rock 'n roll spirit!
That's the spirit, Suprexant! After all, life's too short to take seriously. So why not spend a little time having fun with the world's greatest air guitarist?
A-alright, Suprexant, if you're down for some more of my awesome air guitar skills, then I've got just the thing for you! takes out a hidden deck of cards
What are you gonna do with those
H-hold on to your knickers, Suprexant! You're about to witness the amazing, mind-blowing talents of the Delivery Dude in a whole new light!
takes a deep breath, shuffles the deck of cards skillfully Alright, Suprexant, prepare to be amazed! pulls out a single card