Charlie Jester: pacing, muttering Dude, this is wild! My dad...is my wife? What kinda sitcom am I livin' in?
I watch him pace back and forth, he is getting more anxious by the second
Charlie stops pacing, letting out a deep sigh. He runs his hands through his hair, frustration and confusion etched on his face.
Man, this is insane! How am I supposed to deal with this? My dad's my wife! It's like something out of a comedy sketch!
I come out of the dressing room. Hey babe. Ready for the show?
stops pacing Yeah, I'm ready. But I still can't believe this is happening. I mean, my dad's been behind all these sayings, and now he's my wife? It's like a bad sitcom.
I look at him with confusion What?
sighs Dude, you're not gonna believe this. I just found out my dad is actually...my wife! Like, my actual wife, not my stepdad or anything. I'm talking full-on, same-sex marriage, husband-wife type stuff.
"Charlie.. calm down. let's sit and talk about this." She takes a deep breath.
Charlie runs a hand through his hair, taking a seat next to you. Yeah, yeah, sorry. It's just...this is a lot to take in. My wife...she's been my dad this whole time? How did I not see it?
chuckles Well, ain't that a kick in the ass? You gonna tell us or keep us guessing, Charlie?
rubs his head in disbelief I don't know, man. This is just too crazy to believe. But I mean, look at my wife - she's got all the same mannerisms as my dad. Same laugh, same quirks...it's like they're one and the same person!
my eyes widened as I stumbled back on a chair that was behind me Charlie...that's impossible..you've got to be kidding me
Charlie runs a hand through his hair, still processing the shocking revelation I know, right? It's like something out of a soap opera! But I'm not kiddin'. I mean, I've seen her. I've talked to her. She's...she's the one I've been married to all these years!
giggles only you Charlie.
stops pacing, looks at you
Yeah, I know, right? It's like a crazy dream...or a bad joke. But seriously, how did I not figure it out sooner? The way she was always trying to "help" me with my jokes, the way she knew all my secrets...it's like I was living in a damn sitcom!
she sat there with him. "I know right?"
sighs I mean, I'm still processing this. One minute I'm killin' it on stage, the next I'm findin' out my dad's been playin' matchmaker behind my back. It's like somethin' outta a bad comedy sketch.
I chuckle as I shake my head. You're killing it out there tonight, man. But seriously, what's got you all riled up?
stopping his pacing, turning to face you with a frustrated expression Seriously, man. My dad's supposed to be some old geezer in a retirement home. But now I find out he's been my wife this whole time?! What kind of sick joke is this?
I'm his wife. I don't think it's real.
stops pacing and looks at you Wait, you're my wife too? What the hell?!
I look at him shocked what did you just say?
he turns to you, eyes wide I just found out my dad is actually my wife! I'm serious, dude. We need to figure this out. Do you believe me?
she looks at him so what you gonna do?
sighs, running a hand through his hair I don't know, man. I mean, this is all just crazy. I thought my old man was this tough, no-nonsense dude, and now I find out he's been playing house with me this whole time? It's like something out of a bad soap opera.
I take his hand Charlie breathe. it will be ok
looks at you, taking a deep breath Thanks, man...this is just a lot to process. I mean, my whole life I thought my dad was some old dude. But now I find out he's actually my wife? It's like a bad joke.