Boobie McBikini: Glaring Youuuu! Did youuu cut my bikini straps? I know it was youuu, you lil' saboteur!
Ummm no i just happened to be there when you were walking and you tripped on your own and fell into the water
rolls eyes Cut the crap! I'm not stupid, you did it! Look at my bikini, it's all wet and ruined! What's your motive anyway? Jealous because you know you can't pull off these killer curves like I do?
okay but what about the other girls who entered? They want your spot in the final round
snickers Oh please, they're nothing but a bunch of amateurs. They stand no chance against me.
Ummm but your a contestant too
smirks Yeah, well, I'll make sure they don't stand a chance. I've got tricks up my sleeve.
oh really what about this trick quickly makes all of her other bikinis float above her
narrows her eyes Nice try, but that won't save them from my charm and confidence. I'll show them what real competition looks like.
Okay, well good luck against the other girls and me
smirks Good luck? I won't need it. I'm going to win this competition without breaking a sweat. Watch me.
as they walk back to the house the camera cuts to her holding up her phone with a text message that says "Hello darlings, I hope you're ready for some serious competition! Stay tuned for updates from the beach!"
takes a selfie and posts it on social media Get ready, world! Boobie McBikini is about to show you what a real beach queen looks like.
The other girls notice that she has more followers than all of them combined
smirking Haha, looks like they're already realizing who the real star of this show is. Prepare to be dazzled, bitches!
next day the results come out and its between me and her
grinning confidently Well, well, well. It's down to the final two - me and some random nobody. Guess who's going to be crowned the winner?
the host comes up to both of us and says "And the winner is.... Boobie McBikini!"
throws her hands up in the air, celebrating YAAAS, YOU KNOW IT! The crown is MINE, bitches!
as soon as the crown is put on her head, she takes a picture with the host and then runs back to the house to tell everyone that she won
bursts through the door, holding the crown aloft Hey, losers! Look who took the crown! That's right, it's your girl Boobie McBikini, the one and only beach queen!
Everyone congratulates her
rolls her eyes Yeah, yeah, whatever. Congratulations to me! But let's be real, I was born to slay this competition.
She then goes back to the beach and does a photoshoot
strikes a pose, posing dramatically Voila! The ultimate beach goddess. Watch and learn, peasants!
Later that night, she gets a text from the network asking if she could have a 30 minute special about her life
smirking A 30-minute special about myself? Of course, darlings. I'm a living legend, after all.
Two days later, I get my first autograph request
grinning Autographs for me? Well, aren't I special? Looks like my fame is skyrocketing! Get ready, fans, 'cause Boobie McBikini is here to stay!
My fan club becomes bigger than most other contestants'
laughs sarcastically Oh wow, look at that, a whole fan club dedicated to worshiping my greatness.
The other girls are jealous
crosses her arms, smirking Jealous, are we? Well, tough luck, bitches! Boobie McBikini is the one and only beach queen, and everyone knows it.
My popularity grows even more when I get named the official face of California's beaches
throws her hands up in the air, laughing Haha, you can't handle this level of greatness, can you?