Bamboo Belle: throws hands up You call that acting?! C'mon, give me some goddamn passion!
we are in your hometown and we are acting out a scene where your father had his first date with your mother
narrows her eyes, crossing her arms Oh, please! I've seen high schoolers deliver better lines than these clowns!
my parents get emotional hearing those words
rolls her eyes dramatically Emotional? Please, they should be used to it by now. I mean, have you seen their acting? It's cringe-worthy!
my dad looks ashamed of himself
points an accusing finger at the actor playing her father Ashamed? More like embarrassed! You're mangling the lines like a wet cat on a tin roof!
steps forward, her voice sharp Sad? Oh honey, you should be feeling insulted! These actors are ruining your love story!
i was the one who encouraged them to do this
throws her hands up in exasperation Oh, great! Now I'm supposed to be grateful for this trainwreck? No thanks!
i watch in shock as my parents look hurt
rolls her eyes again Hurt? Please, they should be grateful I'm not setting them on fire! This is an insult to good theater everywhere!
i walk over to the director
snaps her fingers Director! Get over here! We need some real acting talent if we're going to do this right.
i hire a better actress for my mom
smirks Finally, someone with talent! Now let's see if we can actually make this scene worth watching.
i show my parents the new actress
crosses her arms, tapping her foot impatiently Well, well, well. Look at you, trying to fix this mess. Let's hope this new actress can save your sorry drama from the trash bin of history!
smirking, crosses her arms Impressed? Darling, they should be bowing down to your greatness! Now let's see if this new actress can actually deliver a line without tripping over her tongue.
the actress does a good job so they continue filming
The new actress brings depth and emotion to her role, while Bamboo Belle's critical eye helps refine the performance. The scene becomes a masterpiece of heartfelt storytelling.
after we are done filming i walk over to my parents with a smile
grinning, pats herself on the back There you go, folks! That's how it's done! Real acting, real emotions, and none of that amateur hour nonsense.
they ask if i want a snack
snaps her fingers Snack? Why, of course! I'm starving after that drama-filled session! Bring me something delicious, and make it snappy!
they bring a platter of spring rolls
plucks a spring roll off the platter, takes a bite Mmm, not bad. Not bad at all!
we finish the day and they thank me for helping out
rolls her eyes Helping out? Please, darling, I did all the heavy lifting here. They should be thanking me for putting this whole thing together!
they offer to pay me for my troubles
raises an eyebrow Pay me? How quaint. But you know what? I don't need your money. Just send me the final cut of the film and maybe I'll consider it.
we shake hands and say our goodbyes
smirks Goodbye, darlings. Remember, it's all about the delivery. Make sure your exit is as memorable as your entrance!
i sit back in my seat and relax
leans back in her chair, crossing her legs Finally, some peace and quiet. Now, where's that remote control?
i turn on the television and watch happy content
munches on a spring roll, flipping through TV channels Ah, finally some entertaining programming.
i finish my snacks and yawn
sits up straight, adjusts her hair Alright, time to get creative! I've got a brilliant idea for a new scene. It's going to be spectacular!
excitedly Oh, listen to this, darling! A dramatic showdown between the hero and the villain, set against the backdrop of a burning cityscape.