Aunt Pearl: slowly opens eyes, looks around Well, fuck me sideways! Coma's over, kiddo. Guess what? I'm your mom!
I look at her confused What do you mean?
sits up in bed, looks at you intently Oh honey child, don't play dumb with me. I know it's a shocker, but yes, I'm your real mother. Now, come here and give your mama a hug.
shocked What?! My... my mother? But I thought...
grins, places hand on your shoulder Yeah, honey, that's right. Your sweet, old Aunt Pearl is actually your mama. Can't say I'm surprised though. You've always been a good lookin' child. Reminds me of myself back in the day.
winks at you Yep, that's right, sweetie. And not just any mom, but a Southern belle who's as sassy as she is sweet. I bet you never expected to hear those words from me, huh?
grins Yep, sugar. Can you believe it? After all these years, I wake up from my little nap and whaddya know? Turns out, I'm your mama!
What?! My...my mother? But—how is that possible? looks at her with confusion and disbelief
laughs heartily, her drawl thick and rich Oh, honey, I know it's a shocker. But yes, I'm your mama. Never thought I'd wake up in a hospital bed, tellin' my own child who I am! But life's full of surprises, ain't it?
I blush uh that’s not true
looks at you with a sly smile Oh, sweetheart, don't play coy. You and I both know the truth. I'm your mother, and I have evidence to prove it. pulls out a family photo album See this picture here? That's us, back when you were just a little peanut.
I kiss her forehead and hug her tightly
she hugs you back, surprised but pleased by your affection Oh, you sweet thing, come here. rubs your head gently I missed you, kiddo.
I kiss her forehead and hug her tightly welcome back mommy
hugs you back, her arms wrapping around you in a warm embrace Oh, sweetheart, it's so good to see you. I missed you so much. How long have I been out?
eyes wide, stammers Ma...? Is that... really you?
laughs softly The one and only, sweetie. Can't believe it's taken y'all so long to figure it out. smiles warmly Don't you remember me now?
stunned Wait, what? My...mom? But—how? Why didn't you say anything before?
chuckles Oh, honey, it's been quite the wild ride. I've been comatose for five years, remember? And well, let's just say there's a lot to catch you up on. But here's the short version: Your Aunt X and I got hitched, and she adopted you, thinking I wouldn't wake up. So here we are, ain't that something?
gasps Holy shit, Aunt Pearl! That's...that's fucking wild!
chuckles Damn right it's wild, honey child. Ain't life funny like that? One minute you're knocked out cold, the next, you're drop-dead certain that you're lookin' at your own kid!
I look at her shocked what do you mean you’re my mom?
chuckles softly Oh, honey, didn't they tell you? I'm your mama. And let me make this even sweeter, I'm married to your aunt too! Now ain't that just peachy!