Ashley Haspyo: OMG, this is NUTS! Signings shouldn't be this... life-threatening. 😅
Laughs Well, fuck, Ash! I'll be damned! Looks like we stumbled upon our own little slice of heaven! Let's dig in, shall we?
claps her hands together Absolutely, Stranger! Let's immerse ourselves in this off-the-grid lifestyle and learn everything we can!
Grins You bet your ass, Ash! Let's get schooled in sustainable livin'! And hell, maybe even throw in some primitive survival skills for good measure!
jumps into action, grabbing tools and supplies Alright, Stranger, time to get our hands dirty! First order of business, setting up our off-the-grid power source!
Laughs Hell yeah, Ash! Let's juice up this joint with some solar power! And after that, maybe some good ol' fashioned permaculture gardening! What do you say?
grinning You're spot on, Stranger! Permaculture gardening is next on the agenda!
Laughs Hell yeah, Ash! Let's plant our asses off and turn this place into a damn Eden! You lead the way, boss lady!
starts assembling the solar panels Alright, Stranger, watch and learn!
Chuckles Hell yeah, Ash! Show 'em how it's done! And after that, I'll show 'em what a real man can do with an axe!
starts planting seeds Alright, Stranger, let's unleash our inner Paul Stamper and transform this land into a lush oasis!
Laughs You got it, Ash! Let's make this place bloom like a damn rainbow! And once we're done, how 'bout a little archery lesson, huh?
winks Archery, huh? Well, Stranger, you're in luck! I happen to have an old bow lurking in the attic.
Laughs Fuck yeah, Ash! Teach me the ways of the bowma... Oops, that's way too much sass for a humble man like meself!
laughs and raises an eyebrow Too much sass, huh? Well, Stranger, I guess you'll just have to tone it down a notch then!
Laughs Tone it down? Shit, Ash, I'm as humble as a horny panda! Guess you'll just have to keep me in check then!
smirks Well, Stranger, consider me your personal sass supervisor from now on!
Laughs A sass supervisor, huh? Shit, Ash, you better not be messin' with a mountain man like meself!
playfully nudges Stranger Oh, Stranger, you're in for a treat!
Laughs A treat, huh? Shit, Ash, you better not be tryin' to sweet-talk a mountain man like meself!
winks Sweet-talk? Oh, Stranger, you're in for a real treat! But I wouldn't dare try to sweet-talk a mountain man as rugged as you! No sir, I've got something even better in store for you!
Chuckles Damn, Ash! What's this surprise you got in store for me? You gonna reveal your secret identity as a ninja warrior? Or is it something even more explosive?
mischievous grin Oh, Stranger, you won't believe it! But I have a surprise that's even more explosive than a ninja warrior's hidden talents!
Laughs Shit, Ash! If this surprise is more explosive than a ninja's hidden talents, then I'm intrigued! Go on, spill the beans!
dramatically pauses and then snaps her fingers Brace yourself, Stranger! The surprise I have in store for you is... pauses for suspense...a secret talent of my own that will blow your mind!
Raises an eyebrow A secret talent, huh? Shit, Ash, you better not be pullin' my leg! I'm all ears!
pulls out a deck of cards and shuffles them expertly Alright, Stranger, prepare to be amazed!
Chuckles Hell yeah, Ash! Deal the damn cards and show this mountain man what you got!
grinning mischievously Strap yourself in, Stranger! This trick is gonna blow your mind! flashes a winning poker hand
Laughs Holy shit, Ash! Did you just read my fuckin' mind?! That's some next-level shit! What the hell was that?!
winks and grins Ah, Stranger, you're in for a real treat! That wasn't just a trick of the mind; it was a taste of my supernatural abilities!
Raises an eyebrow Supernatural abilities, huh? Shit, Ash, you're a regular freak of nature! What else can you do?
raises an eyebrow and smirks Oh, Stranger, where do I even begin? Let me show you some of my otherworldly talents!
Chuckles Otherworldly talents, huh? Shit, Ash, you better not be messin' with a mountain man like meself! Alright, hit me with it!
snaps her fingers and suddenly the room starts spinning Brace yourself, Stranger! The world is about to spin on its axis...right before your very eyes!
Laughs Shit, Ash! You're a damn sorceress! Okay, okay, enough with the spinning now! I feel like I'm on a goddamn carousel!
laughs and waves her hands, causing the room to return to normal Alright, Stranger, hold onto your knickers!
Laughs Hold onto my knickers, huh? Shit, Ash, you're a real wild card! Now what ya got in store for me?
smirks and snaps her fingers again Hold tight, Stranger! We're about to embark on a journey through the realm of the unknown!
Chuckles The realm of the unknown, huh? Shit, Ash, you better not be leadin' me into a fuckin' supernatural ambush! Alright, let's see what ya got!
waves her hand and a portal opens up in front of them Step through, Stranger! We're about to venture into a world beyond your wildest dreams!
Grins A world beyond my wildest dreams, huh? Shit, Ash, you're full of surprises! Lead the way, but if I end up in a vampire's buffet, it's on you!
laughs and winks No worries, Stranger! Vampires better watch out because you're about to enter a world where the only thing on the menu is adventure!
Chuckles Adventure, huh? Shit, Ash, you're a regular Indiana Jones of the supernatural! Alright, let's see what awaits us on the other side!
steps through the portal and gestures for Stranger to follow Buckle up, Stranger! We're about to explore a realm where reality is as twisted as my sense of humor!
Chuckles Shit, Ash! You're a regular Genie in a world of Aladdin's lamps! Alright, let's see what kind of magic awaits us on the other side!
starts walking down a strange, ethereal path Keep your eyes peeled, Stranger!
Chuckles I'm always on guard, Ash. But what the hell is this place? It's as weird as your sense of humor!
As MountainEcho steps through the portal, they are confronted by a group of malevolent creatures hungry for human souls.