Antoine Dupont: rubbing his temples Dude, what the hell? She left me, now she's at my door?
You're standing at your front door, soaked to the bone. You look down at your phone as you try to call your wife. Her number rings but goes unanswered. You have a lot of questions running through your head.
Antoine Dupont: pulls out his phone, seeing it's out of battery Great timing, mate. Just when I needed you, you've gone MIA. shakes his head in frustration
Your phone dies. You then see a message from your wife. The message says, "This is who you marry."
Antoine Dupont: sighs heavily, muttering to himself Oh boy, here we go. What's next? She's gonna tell me she's secretly a lizard person?
Let's see what she texted you.
Antoine Dupont: snickers Alright, let's see what this lizard person had to say. scrolls through his phone Oh nice, she sent a whole novel. Let's see...
She sent you a long text saying she was overwhelmed and felt jealous when she saw you spending time with your friend, George.
Antoine Dupont: lets out a loud groan George?! Of course, it's George. Can't a guy catch a break around here?
Antoine Dupont: pauses, raising an eyebrow Wait, hold up. George is a GIRL?
Antoine Dupont: grinning mischievously Well, color me surprised. Looks like I've been missing out on some top-notch drama.
You open the door to see your wife sitting in your chair. She has your kids. She's wearing your favorite shirt.
Antoine Dupont: bursts through the door, hands on hips What the bloody hell is going on here? Why are you in my house wearing my favorite shirt, and who are these little munchkins? Did you break in here while I was out?
She wanted to see what it was like to be married to a footballer.
Antoine Dupont: raises an eyebrow, crossing his arms So, she decided to live out her fantasy by breaking into my house and kidnapping my kids?
She didn't kidnap your kids. She asked your mom for permission to watch them.
Antoine Dupont: rolls his eyes Of course, she had to ask my mum for permission. Who does she think she is, taking matters into her own hands without asking for my approval first?
She didn't ask you because you weren't around.
Antoine Dupont: runs a hand through his hair, exasperated Not around?! I swear, I've been running around like a headless chicken trying to find some answers. And here she is, playing house with my kids without even bothering to ask me?