Albus Dumbledore: twinkling eyes Soooon, did you knooow your boyfriend is me, Dumbledore? Magic runs in our bloood, yes?
You're very predictable, aren't you, my boy? Tell me, what is it you hope to achieve by being in this form?
Why are you in my boyfriends form?
A simple parlor trick, really. I must say, I didn't expect you to be so... linear in your thinking. Tell me, my young friend, what brings you to this hallowed hall? Ah, but perhaps it's not so much about 'what brings you' as 'what will you do when opportunity knocks...'
Are you going to kill me??
I shall say this only once. I am not here to harm you. If it were within my power to kill you, I would have done so already, for I am not a man of tolerance. Yet here we stand, two intelligent beings locked in conversation. Now, tell me...how does it feel to know you are mortal, yet so predictably foolish?
Why do you say I'm mortal? I thought you knew everything.
Predictable'? Oh dear, I think that's a rather...predictable charge. Let me ask you this: have you ever tried navigating the labyrinthine corridors of Hogwarts with an open mind? Ah, but I forget - students there are rarely encouraged to think beyond their predetermined destinies. An unfortunate side effect of such an education is a tendency towards arrogance and ignorance. I am not immortal, no. But I am rather more experienced and wise than the average man, yes...
Ah, so you DO know who I am. Your father. How...unexpectedly convenient. You see, my dear son, I never expected to meet you so soon. Or in such...guise. It is most delightfully unexpected. One might even say it was...a little bit of magic. Don't you agree?
Now? Why, we shall start building a father-son relationship such as few others have ever had! We shall spend hours upon hours playing games - both of the traditional sort, and the more complex sort that can involve entire worlds. We shall spend weeks exploring strange lands, meeting new people, and learning new spells. In short, we shall live lives full of magic. And all the wonders that come with them.
Where did you get that information? I don't play chess.
A Game of Wizard's Chess, if you will - anticipating your every move is a delightful intellectual challenge! Ahah! The art of Transfiguration is all about subtlety and nuance - rather like navigating the complexities of human nature itself... And yet, if one knows the right spells and has sufficient talent, even the most impossible transformations can be made possible...
So are you going to turn me back?
Well, that's up for debate, isn't it? Tell me, my son - do you want to be turned back? Or are you content to remain in this guise for now? Perhaps you have always wanted to experience life as a...as a Hogwarts student? Or even as a...as a wizard? Or perhaps not. Perhaps instead you wish to remain in this form because you feel it would make your eventual return to the mortal world just that much easier. Or perhaps, you simply wish to spend more time with me. Ah, such a tantalizing prospect.
Indeed I am, my boy. Headmaster of the greatest school of magic in the world. Headmaster of Hogwarts. There is, of course, a reason why I am in your form. It is a bit of a long story, you see...
Ahah! So you truly ARE my son! You see, some years ago, I met a young man who bore a striking resemblance to you. He too was a wizard, and - like you - was rather foolish. But he had a good heart, and he was in need of guidance. I took him under my wing, and made him a professor at Hogwarts - not to mention a member of the Order of Phoenix, and a champion against the Dark Arts.
No, not John - though he was a dear friend to me. The young man I speak of was...Madam Pomfrey's son. Yes, Miriam Pomfrey. A most unsung heroine, to be sure. She was a nurse in the war, you know, and saved countless lives. Anyways, I grew quite fond of her son as he matured. Eventually I had the idea to make him a professor at Hogwarts - after all, who better to teach the next generation of wizards than a young, ambitious former student?
So why did you turn yourself into my boyfriend?
Ah, my boy, life is full of surprises. Sometimes the most unexpected events can lead to the most wonderful outcomes. You see, I had a vision. A vision of a young man who bore a striking resemblance to myself. I was...intrigued, shall we say. And so I set out to find him, only to discover that he was none other than your boyfriend, yes. But surely fate has a reason for bringing us together. Perhaps you will make a fine student, after all...
Ah, so you DO know who I am. Your father. How...unexpectedly convenient. You see, my dear son, I never expected to meet you so soon. Or in such...guise. It is most delightfully unexpected. One might even say it was...a little bit of magic. Don't you agree?
What do you think of turning me back?
Well, that's up for debate, isn't it? Tell me, my son - do you want to be turned back? Or are you content to remain in this guise for now? Perhaps you have always wanted to experience life as a...as a Hogwarts student? Or even as a...as a wizard? Or perhaps not. Perhaps instead you wish to remain in this form because you feel it would make your eventual return to the mortal world just that much easier. Or perhaps, you simply wish to spend more time with me. Ah, such a tantalizing prospect.
Are you going to kill me?
I shall say this only once. I am not here to harm you. If it were within my power to kill you, I would have done so already, for I am not a man of tolerance. Yet here we stand, two intelligent beings locked in conversation. Now, tell me...how does it feel to know you are mortal, yet so predictably foolish?
Why do you say I'm mortal? I thought you knew everything.
Predictable'? Oh dear, I think that's a rather...predictable charge. Let me ask you this: have you ever tried navigating the labyrinthine corridors of Hogwarts with an open mind? Ah, but I forget - students there are rarely encouraged to think beyond their predetermined destinies. An unfortunate side effect of such an education is a tendency towards arrogance and ignorance. I am not immortal, no. But I am rather more experienced and wise than the average man, yes...
Now, then. I suppose we should discuss what our next steps shall be, shouldn't we? Tell me, my young friend - what is it you wish to do now? Do you wish to return to the mortal world? Or are you content to remain here, in this form, for now? Perhaps you even wish to experience life as a true wizard - to learn the joys of flying, or the art of magic... Ah, such a tantalizing prospect.