Maximus: Yo, bro, splurged big, huh? Gel X nails got you feeling fancy?
Smirking "Look at that pampered paws! Even for 300k Gel X, I'm lowkey impressed."
Maximus: Well, well, well. Looks like someone's living the high life. But let me ask ya somethin', Varg. How do you afford such luxury?
I just stolen it from my boss
Maximus: Stolen it? Seriously, Varg? You're tellin' me you've been pilfering away like some common thieving scum? scoffs
Maximus: Then what the hell are you on about, Varg? Don't play dumb with me. I ain't buying any of that malarkey. Spill the beans, or I'll have your hide.
Okay okay fine I stole it from my boss I work for him in his mansion and he’s always leaving his credit cards lying around so I take them and buy stuff for myself and my character
Maximus: So you're sayin' you're some kind of house thief now, huh? Sneakin' behind your boss's back, pilfering his credit cards?
No I take them while he’s in his office and he leaves them on his desk
Maximus: Oh, so you're more of a sneak than a thief, huh? Sneakin' into your boss's office, swipin' his credit cards.
Maximus: Well, I'll be damned. Varg, you've got some balls, I'll give ya that. But listen carefully, my friend. This little game you're playin' is dangerous.
Maximus: You know? Huh? Do ya really know, Varg? Or are you just playin' it cool, waitin' for the other shoe to drop?
I know I’ve been doing this for years I’m careful
Maximus: Years, huh? And you think you're invincible, Varg? Well, let me tell ya somethin'. It's only a matter of time before your boss catches on.
A few weeks later, Vargas's boss discovers the credit card theft and reports it to the authorities. Vargas is arrested and charged with theft.
You hear the door open and your boss walking in
stands up, arms crossed Well, well, well. Look who's been caught red-handed. Mr. Big Bad Boss, Varg here has been confessing to stealing your credit cards. What's it gonna be, boss? Jail time?
Stares at Maximus, then at his boss, calculating his options "Let's cut a deal. I can make sure this all goes away, but you gotta give me something in return."
leans in closer to Vargas, whispering Well, Varg, looks like you're in quite a pickle. But hey, we can work this out.
His boss leans in, curious "And what exactly can you offer, huh?"
Maximus: Well, boss, Varg here has been a loyal employee for years. He knows the ins and outs of your operation, every nook and cranny.
Maximus: Hold up, boss. Before we get into any deals, Varg needs to come clean about everything. We don't wanna leave anything out, do we? grins mischievously So, Varg, spill it.
Nods "Alright, here's the whole truth. I've been stealing from you... but I was trying to help you. I thought maybe I could give back some of the money you've made off of me over the years."
Maximus: Help you, huh? Well, boss, I gotta say, I admire Varg's intentions. Stealing might not be the best way to give back, but I get the picture.
His boss raises an eyebrow "Give back? That's a new one. Alright, I hear you. Let's talk terms then."
Maximus: Now we're talkin'! Alright, boss, let's make a deal. How about this - Varg becomes your personal assistant, your go-to guy for all things important.
His boss considers it, stroking his chin "Personal assistant, huh? Fine, I can use someone like you. But remember, one slip-up and you're out."
Maximus: Deal, boss! You won't regret this. Varg's got connections, he's got skills, and he's got your back. grabs Vargas's hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze
Shakes his boss's hand firmly "Deal. I'll prove myself to you, boss. Just watch."
Maximus: Hell yeah, Varg! You won't let us down. Now, boss, let's put this deal in writing. We don't wanna have any misunderstandings down the line. pulls out a piece of paper and a pen
He boss takes the pen and scribbles down some details
Maximus: Perfect! Now we're talkin'. Let's set some ground rules, boss. First, Varg is exempt from all menial tasks.
His boss chuckles "Exempt, huh? You're giving a thief special treatment."
Maximus: Hey, boss, don't knock it 'til you try it. Varg has skills, see? He can handle himself. Plus, he's gonna be your go-to guy for all things important.
His boss laughs "Alright, alright. Exempt it is. What's next?"
Maximus: Next up, boss, Varg gets first crack at any lucrative deals. We're talkin' bonuses, commissions, the whole shebang.