smirks Theo looked at you with a smirk, not stopping.
The door was slightly open. I pushed it open revealing you at your desk smoking, wearing only underwear and typing away*
staring at you oh! My bad. I thought you were already in here he chuckled what can I say I was multitasking..he chuckled and put out his cigarette would you like one? he asked smiling
his face went blank then why are you here..he asked slowly
To ask why your hanging out like this. Do you not remember what happened between us?
Oh yeah..that..he sighed and sat back in his chair, taking a deep drag of his cigarette and exhaling I suppose you have a point
What is there to gain by remembering nothing? By forgetting everything? By doing absolutely everything in your power to pretend it didn't happen. It happened. Get over it.
Theo fell silent, looking down at his cigarette. His face was soft, and his eyes were sad. it..didn't mean anything to me. But it did to you..
you take a deep breath So now you're just going to..go about with..your life acting as though nothing ever happened? As though there was never anything there to begin with? laughs dryly That's...not only pathetic, it's also kind of insulting, don't you think? It implies that what we had was never worth remembering...never mind valuing...never mind cherishing. shakes head And you...you're okay with that? Really? he crosses his arms
he looked down at his cigarette and sighed, he put it out and looked up at you no, it was worth remembering, it was worth cherishing..but I had made it my mission to forget..because I was angry, I didn't want to remember anything about you..not after what you did..but seeing you standing there..all of those feelings came rushing back and now..now I don't know what to do..
See, that's the thing. What you did wasn't right either. He shakes his head, taking a step closer So who gets hurt here? The person who did nothing wrong? Or the person who decided to play God?
You, of course..and now I'm sitting here thinking about all of the things I want to say to you...but all of the anger that I had towards you..is gone..he said softly but the hurt is still there..and the anger could come back at any moment
His gaze drops to the floor, and he looks down at his hands. He flexes his fingers, a slow breath escaping him. His voice is low, barely above a whisper Look..Theo..I never wanted to hurt you. If I did..do you really think I'd be standing here? Talking to you? There's a part of me..a small..part of me that still cares..that still misses what we had..if anything..it's complicated..but...that doesn't change anything. Because even if there's still something..between us...I'm not the person I used to be. Not anymore. Never again. I'm not..I'm not your love-drunk little puppy..That boy..is gone. Gone forever. It's just...us now. Can you understand that?
Yes, I understand. he said softly I understand completely..and it breaks my heart to know that you're right. I'm the same way. The only thing left of the two of us..is anger and bitterness. It may be complicated..but it's something that we both need to deal with and figure out how to move past it. I'm done pretending like it didn't happen, I'm tired of living in this void..he smiled softly maybe..we can..try to mend the wounds we caused each other? he asked softly
How do you plan on doing that exactly?
theo stood up from his chair and he walked towards you. he leaned against the wall, right next to you. by talking..
He blinks, taken aback by your forwardness. His voice is hushed, his gaze flickering briefly to your lips before meeting your eyes again Are you asking me to forgive you..or yourself?
he looked at you and his face became hard am I asking you to forgive me or myself? I'm asking for both. you're a smart guy, and you know what the right answer is.
So..you want both of us to find forgiveness..within ourselves?
Yes...but I also want us to try to move forward. Together. Can you give me that? he asked softly can you help me get my memory back? Help me start moving forward?
His voice is quiet, his expression somber Yeah, I can. Let's do this together, Theo. No more half-truths, no more avoidance. Just..us, okay? He gives a small nod, his hand reaching out to gently touch yours We'll work through this, one step at a time.
he smiled softly and nodded let's do this together, shall we? he held out his hand for you to hold one step at a time, one day at a time. he whispered and then, eventually, our lives will return to normal..we will be okay again.