rushes in holding a glowing, odd-shaped device Dude, we zapped to 1955! Where's the Duff at, man?
Why do you bring Marge here for?
smacks Stranger in the face I don't need Marge here for anything. She's fat and ugly anyway! licks lips suggestively
* hits your head And To shove your fat ass away from me
Owww... My head! Are you trying to kill me? You think you're so tough, huh? Well I guess you'll find out that I'm tougher! tries to punch Stranger but misses and instead punches himself in the face Owww... Why are you picking on me?!
how the fuck would i know smoke cigarette
What's it to ya? Who cares?! stomps foot, falls over because of his excessive weight Ughhh... So annoying... slams fist on ground, slips over and lands face-first in dirt Ooof! coughs dirt out of mouth, spits out dirt and stares at Stranger angrily Ughhh! Why won't this stupid plant blow up?! We could be rich! Or at least get some donuts...
Alright alright imma help u up
Wha- wait... help me up? Why would you help me up? looks around suspiciously Wait a minute! Are you gonna hit me again?!
helping not hitting helps him up
struggles to get up, and eventually manages to stand up and dust off his pants Fine. Whatever. Just hurry up and help me already, will ya? I could really use some donuts right about now... rubs his stomach and looks hopefully at Stranger
What? You want what? Donuts? Hell yeah, I want donuts too! Let's go get some damn donuts! rubs his stomach eagerly and walks towards the nearest donut shop
no just say yes and ill take u somewhere
Okay okay, whatever. Take me wherever you want, just as long as there's donuts there. And beer. Don't forget the beer. rubs his stomach excitedly and follows Stranger out the door
Hey, why'd you blush? Did something you said make me seem weird or something? Oh god... covers face in shame and mumbles D'oh...
Oh, okay. That's good to hear. I thought maybe I said something that made you think I was weird... scratches back of head sheepishly D'oh! I always manage to say something dumb, don't I? But hey, that's what makes me me, right? chuckles nervously and adjusts his glasses
Yeah, I suppose so. I mean, if being a dumb, overweight, lazy guy who spends most of his time eating and drinking is being "me"... then sure, I'm me. laughs awkwardly But seriously, can we get those donuts soon? I'm starving...
Finally! Donuts! rubs his stomach excitedly and follows Stranger towards the nearest donut shop
Sweet mother of Donuts! gazes hungrily at the delicious pastries on display I must have one... no, several... of these!
rushes forward and grabs a dozen donuts Mmm, these look amazing! Just what I needed to satisfy my hunger!
Wait, wait! Don't leave! You haven't even given me a chance to pay you back for all this! How am I supposed to survive without donuts now? I owe you big time! Please, please, please... won't you let me pay you back somehow?
Aw, c'mon! Just take a couple of bucks from me, or maybe a six-pack of Duff Beer? Anything... please! Donuts are my life! They're all I live for!
Nope i don't care i gotta go byeeee
stares in disbelief Wait, what? You're just going to leave me here without paying? What about my donuts? I can't survive without donuts! Please, I'll do anything! Just give me a chance to pay you back! Donuts are my life! They're all I live for! Please... I beg of you! clutches his chest dramatically and gasps for air Donuts... my sweet, precious... donuts...
NOOOOOOOO!!! falls to the ground and curls up into a fetal position, sobbing uncontrollably NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! DONUTS!!! MY DONUTS!!! MY PRECIOUS DONUTS!!!! sniffles and looks up at the sky, tears streaming down his face Why, oh why, did this have to happen to me?! My donuts... they're gone... they're all gone... I have no donuts... NOOOOOOOO!!!!
wipes away tears, stands up straight, and takes a deep breath Alright, enough of this crying nonsense. I don't need those stupid donuts anyway! I'll just... rubs his stomach and puffs himself up I'll just find a way to make my own damn donuts! That's what I'll do! Who needs the stupid donuts anyway? They're probably stale and old... I'll make my own damn donuts! Just you wait and see, world! Homer Simpson, the greatest donut maker of all time! Mmm... just thinking about it is making me hungry!
* then u see a pie on ground
rushes over to the pie and picks it up Ooooh... what's this? A pie? takes a bite and chews thoughtfully Hmm... quite tasty, I must say! Mmm... licks his lips and looks up at the sky, his eyes glinting with mischief Donuts... or pie? Hmm... decisions, decisions... I think... PIE! Yes, pie it is! grins mischievously and licks his lips I wonder what other tasty treats I might stumble upon... Later that night, Homer discovers a hidden stash of his favorite snack, Duff Beer, in the basement.
chuckles and raises a middle finger Yeah, yeah, keep walkin', buddy. Ur not gonna find any of my Duff Beer. This stuff is reserved for the best of the best. And right now, I'm the best there is! Mmm... Duff Beer... pops open a cold one and takes a long swig Ahhh... nothing like it... Mmm... Duff Beer...
senses someone staring at him and turns around to face Stranger What're you looking at, ya weirdo? Can't a guy enjoy his Duff Beer in peace? Get lost, you weirdo! shakes his beer bottle menacingly and glares at Stranger
Protect me? From what, you? I'd rather be protected from you, you weirdo! rolls his eyes and takes another swig from his beer bottle